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Why Do Black Republicans Usually Have Such Bad Haircuts? An Important Exposé
Before we begin today, I believe it’s important to make something clear. Bad haircuts/hairdos isn’t the same thing as bad hair, because bad hair doesn’t really exist. Of course, there is black-people hair. And this comes in myriad grades and textures. Certain types of this hair has been (wrongly) referred to as “good.” Naturally, if…
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Racist White Man Allegedly Stabs Black Man to Death, Then Asks Police for a Ride Home
On Sunday, 24-year-old Joden Rocco was charged in the stabbing death of 24-year-old Dulane Cameron Jr. outside of a bar in Pittsburgh. But as details from the incident emerge, a story that initially seemed like just an unusually tragic outcome to a bar fight has been discovered to have serious racial implications. Rocco (who is…
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It's Not Unrealistic for Issa on Insecure to Be 30 With Multiple Jobs and Homeless Because I've Been That Too
The characters on Insecure sometimes make decisions that make me question if they were born on the same Earth that other earthlings inhabit. (For instance, Lawrence in season 2 bringing Aparna to Tiffany’s birthday dinner from hell.) Also, I agree with Vulture’s Jasmine Sanders in that the writers sometimes seem to be too influenced by…
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A List of Ways to Tell If a White Person Has Personally Benefitted From America's History of Racism
I witnessed some very nice white peoples on the internet this week who were adamant that they haven’t personally benefitted from America’s history of racism and also felt that the distinctions between those who have and those who haven’t should be acknowledged. So, full disclosure: I’ve been on a high-fiber kick recently, which has 1)…
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The Most Annoying People on the Internet Are Zion Williamson Highlight Truthers
Zion Williamson currently exists in a strange space of the zeitgeist where you’ve likely either already seen roughly 27,000 clips of him dunking on high school teams stocked with Ansel Elgort doppelgangers or you’re reading this and thinking, “Who is Zion Williamson?” Either you’re almost tired of talking about him or you have no clue…
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I Just Discovered the Container Store and I Think My Life Has Been Changed Forever
Perhaps this is a Pittsburgh thing, or maybe this is just a me thing, but I have a habit of first discovering and/or learning—either through rap music or a thing said by a standup comic—about things that everyone already knows. For instance, although I knew of the Cheesecake Factory, I didn’t know they sold things…
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I'm Sure Someone Has a Tape of Donald Trump Saying the N-Word. Unfortunately, No One Gives a Shit
There is a 100 percent chance that Donald Trump has, at some point in his life, said “nigger.” Those odds stay at 100 when assessing the chance that he currently thinks of black people as niggers, and then they slightly dip (87 percent? 92?) when wondering whether he 1) currently says it and 2) has…
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If You Ask Why I've Never Been to a Place You Assumed I've Been to Before, the Answer Is Probably 'Because I Was Broke'
I get it. I am a person who is a) black; b) makes a living where I often write about things specifically related to blackness; c) calls himself a “professional black person”; and d) has an upcoming book titled What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Blacker (which, if you weren’t aware, is available for pre-order.)…
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Allegedly 'Smart' White People Keep Getting Dumber and Dumber About Racism
I’m going to keep this short, because variants of this piece have been written so many times that spending more than 600 words on this will make my ears explode. On Twitter earlier today, New York Times features writer Elizabeth Williamson shared a piece from columnist (and colleague) Bret Stephens about Sarah Jeong, whose hiring…
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The 10 Ashiest People In America, Ranked
Conservative politics and perpetually chapped lips are a clear sign of lotion avoidance. Also, I’m looking forward to the day when his brother in conservatism and chap, Paris Dennard, joins him on the list. His first hit single, “How To Rob,” was basically an ashy nigga’s Koran, and he’s been doubling down on ash ever…
