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Five Reasons Why Russell Wilson Is The Worst Kind Of Sucker-Ass Simp-Ass Sucker
1. He’s dating someone new, and is actually bringing her name up in interviews and taking her to events with him, like he’s actually happy to be with her and proud of her or something. Who the hell does that? Besides a sucker-ass simp-ass simp-ass sucker? 2. He’s dating someone who has apparently dated other…
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I'm Going To Have A Daughter. I Love Rap Music. These Two Things Do Not Match
They said I can’t rap about being broke no moreThey ain’t say I can’t rap about coke no more The Wife Person and I have driven to the D.C. area four times this summer. And, with each drive comes a couple dozen or so new additions to my Spotify playlist; a trip soundtrack occasionally interrupted by Google…
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Where Does Meek Mill's "Wanna Know" Place On The "Greatest Letdowns Of All-Time" Scale?
Meek Mill seems poised to put a new spin on “in with a bang, out with a whimper.” Except by “bang” it’s him sounding “like he’s ordering McDonalds from the backseat” (ht Tristan) and by “whimper” it’s “releasing a response diss so shitty even actual pieces of shit were like “Damn. That stinks.” It was, to…
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Exclusive: A Leaked Email Exchange Between Drake And Meek Mill From Last Night
Last week, our sources were somehow able to find an email conversation between Nicki Minaj and Meek Mill. And, wouldn’t you know it, those same sources found another email conversation, but between Meek Mill and Drake from last night. A condensed version can be found below. From: kingofthewoes@gmail.com: To: NOCHILLMILL@msn.com: 4:07am Look, my dude. I’m willing to…
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Can Someone Please Tell Me Why Sneakers Cost So Much Damn Money?
I try to be mindful (annoyingly mindful, according to some of my friends) not to allow nostalgia or an emotional connection to the past cloud my assessment of the present. One, because people are usually wrong about that stuff, and I enjoy not being wrong. It’s fun. But also, remembering the past in an historical sense is…
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The Footage Of Sam DuBose's Murder Is Hard To Watch, Which Is Why We Must Watch It
Earlier today, University of Cincinnati police officer Ray Tensing was charged with murder in the death of Sam DuBose, a man Tensing stopped for a traffic violation two weeks ago. Tensing has turned himself in, and the city seems poised to distance themselves as far as possible from him, using words like “senseless” and “asinine”…
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I Double Dog Dare You To Watch This Story About Zion Harvey, The Boy Who Received A Double Hand Transplant
And somehow manage not to… 1. Be overcome by your “allergies” or a sudden feeling that someone near you must be cutting onions or something. 2. Think about the first thing you’d do if you were recently given hands for the first time. And then spend the the entire morning debating whether that was the…
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10 Things You Should Totally, Definitely, Absolutely Say To A Writer
#Tenthingsnottosaytoawriter has been trending all day, and has produced some gems, including… …and… But, what do writing-ass people actually want to hear? Good question. 1. “Yeah, we definitely pay writers. Wouldn’t dare ask you to work for free or for “recognition” or some bullshit like that.” 2. “We have direct deposit.” 3. “We received and processed your…
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10 Black Men Who Could Use Your Irrational Unconditional Support Instead Of Bill Cosby
I feel you, man. I really do. You stayed on the Bill Cosby bandwagon as long as you possibly could — refusing to allow America to lynch an iconic Black man — but the ride just got too bumpy. The wheels flew off, the steering wheel broke, the seat belts got recalled, and the rotors did…
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Those Damn Kids Today…Are Actually Much Better People Than We Were
Predictably, the Meek Mill/Drake feud was the main topic of conversation in my barbershop Friday. In the hour or so I was there, the following points were touched on: The importance of whether Drake has a ghostwriter This entire feud happening because Meek Mill is feeling insecure because he’s fighting above his weight with Nicki…
