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Bill Clinton Is Not An "Honorary Black Person." Bill Clinton Can Go Fuck Off Somewhere
My second favorite line in Anchorman comes when an inebriated Champ Kind admits to a romantic crush he’s had on Ron Burgundy (“I miss your musk… When this all gets sorted out, I think you and me should get an apartment together!”), and Brian Fantana replies “Take it easy, Champ. Why don’t you sit this next…
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The Jordan Cry Face Meme Was Never Particularly Funny, And We Need To Retire It
There was a four to six month stretch in 2004 where I probably ate a Quinzos sub somewhere between four to 14 times a week. It was a relatively new franchise then. (At least new to Pittsburgh.) And I was so excited by the various meats and toasted breads and assembly line convection oven way…
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Bomani Jones's "Caucasians" Shirt Is The Blackest Thing That Ever Happened Today
Although calling Bomani Jones the Internet’s greatest troll — which is how EBONY’s Jamilah Lemieux introduced him to me through an email a couple years ago — might seem like an insult, it’s not. It’s actually a compliment. Because there are two types of trolling. The first kind is the most common and also happens to…
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Beyonce's 10 Greatest Beyonces Of All-Time
We first met Beyonce as Teenaged Beyonce — a member of the preternaturally talented and peculiarly attired Destiny’s Child. And now, she’s firmly ensconced into Grown-Ass Beyonce. Or, if you prefer, Capricorn Cabaret Beyonce. Or perhaps even “Who’s The Thick Aunt In The Stands With The Shades And The Cooler At Soccer Practice? She’s Fine As Hell.…
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White Privilege Seems Like an Abstract Idea Until You Remember It Kills Black People
My mom was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer in November 2012. At that point, she was given four to six months to live. But she held on for an entire year, not succumbing to the disease until November 2013. Her diagnosis, while devastating, was not a surprise. She had been a smoker for more…
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White Privilege Seems Like An Abstract Concept, Until You Remember It Kills Black People
My mom was diagnosed with stage four lung cancer in November of 2012. At that point, she was given four to six months to live. But she held on for an entire year, not succumbing to the disease until November of 2013. Her diagnosis, while devastating, was not a surprise. She was a smoker for…
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Allen Iverson's Greatest Contribution To Basketball Is An Unstoppable And Completely Illegal Dribble Move
There exists among many sports fans a reflexive need to assign a mysticism and morality to what happens on the field. If a team happens to win a game, it’s because they “wanted it more” than the other team, and not because they just happened to make more shots. If a player performs well in…
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Tidal Is the Streaming-Service Equivalent of My Ex’s Mom’s Runny Eggs
In my early 20s, I dated a woman (“Kim”) for a little over a year. We met at the Gap—she was working there and I entered the store while she was working there to pretend like I was buying a “sweater for my sister” with the hope that she’d ask if I needed any help…
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The Most Entertaining Piece Of Hate Mail I've Ever Received, Deconstructed
It’s been a little over a week since I first wrote about Wendy Bell, the WTAE-TV news anchor whose racially insensitive Facebook post led to her losing her job. In the time since, I’ve received approximately 300 Bell-related emails. Most of which — I’d say 85 to 90 percent — have been very positive, appreciative, and…
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White Privilege Explained, With Help From Ex-News Anchor Who Lost Her Job Over a Racist Facebook Post
Who is Wendy Bell? Before Wednesday, Wendy Bell was a lead anchor for WTAE-TV, Pittsburgh’s ABC affiliate. Today, Thursday, however, she’s the white Pittsburgh female equivalent of Tommy from Martin. So she’s unemployed? Yes. What happened? A week ago, as a response to a shooting in Wilkinsburg, Pa. (a suburb of Pittsburgh), that left six…

