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Marshawn Lynch Tried to Light A Blunt Off Al Davis’ Eternal Flame And Proves He’s The Hero We Need
There is a rumor that once while getting ready for an unusually brisk day in Oakland, Calif., a young Marshawn Lynch found a “fuck” in his jacket pocket. Confused, young Marshawn promptly tossed the fuck into the cool Oakland air and according to everyone who witnessed that historic moment, it was the last fuck Marshawn…
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Trump Bragged to Troops About a 10 Percent Pay Raise He Never Gave Them
After being shamed into visiting the troops around Christmastime, President Artie Lange’s Coke Nose boasted to American troops in Iraq about the 10 percent pay raise he fought for to make sure soldiers were taken care of because had it not been for a doctor writing a bogus bill of health to keep him out…
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The Shutdown Could End Tomorrow But Dealing With Trump Is Like Negotiating With a Criminal
Before taking office, President Donald Trump shouted from the rafters about his ability to get deals done. He truly sold white America on his business acumen and ability to seal the deal. Now we all realize that his business methods are equivalent to a goon holding a debtor’s kids in a seedy basement until he…
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Referee With Racist Past Forces Black Student to Cut Dreadlocks or Forfeit Wrestling Match
A New Jersey high school wrestler was reportedly told by a referee with a history of racist behavior to cut his dreadlocks or forfeit his match during a competition Thursday. A now-viral video shows Buena High School wrestler Andrew Johnson having his locks sheared off by what is most likely an athletic trainer as he…
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Stephen Miller Left His Lacefront Back at the Crib, Does Interview Without His Spray-On Baby Hair
White House senior policy adviser Stephen Miller has started his natural no-hair journey. He’s ditched his canned quick-weave and told his barber to “pull the sunroof back” as he made a Thursday night appearance on CNN and host Wolf Blitzer didn’t say “I see that the back of your head has reached a peace treaty…
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Trump Tells Republicans to Go ‘Nuclear’ for Border Wall, GOP Tells Crazy Old Man to Go Sit Down
Senate Republicans have kindly told President “Boarder” Wall to go fuck himself over his claims that they should change Senate rules to bully funding for his dumb as Lego Wall along the Mexican border. “I’ve long said that eliminating the legislative filibuster would be a mistake,” said outgoing Senate Finance Committee Chairman Orrin Hatch (R-Utah)…
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#HallwayHasselhoff: Human Border Wall Harasses Black Men for Proof of Residency
Since President Trump has deputized whiteness, a colonizer was caught on tape shortly after staking claim to an apartment building he’s lived in for 27 years and demanding to see a black resident’s freedom papers. A video posted Thursday on Twitter shows Colonizer Chad informing a black neighbor that he couldn’t possibly live in the…
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Our President Just Tweeted a Photo of Himself Wearing a Hillbilly Onesie and We’re Probably All Going to Die
The Donald J. Trump parody Twitter account is hilarious. Today, out of nowhere, it posted this uproarious tweet before the actual president’s signing of a farm bill. The Root staff writer Michael Harriot: That isn’t a parody account, Stephen. Me: Wait, what are you saying? MH: I’m saying that the president tweeted that from his…
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Did Fox and Friends Force Trump to Shut Down the Government If He Doesn’t Get His Border Wall?
While the Senate was busy passing a bill to keep the government open, Fox and Friends were busy calling out the president for caving to Congress for agreeing to sign a bill that didn’t include his “boarder” wall. “This is going to be a problem for Republicans,” guest host Jebidiah Bila said. “I think a…
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Josh Gordon Is Either a Subject of His Own Stupidity or a Tragic Victim of Drugs and Mental Health Issues… Or Both
New England Patriots wide receiver Josh Gordon is leaving the game he played all his life for the umpteenth time. Gordon said Thursday that the break was to focus on his mental health but sources tell ESPN that Gordon is facing another suspension for violating the conditional reinstatement terms under the NFL’s drug policy. The…
Black News and Black Views with a Whole Lotta Attitude
