theory & essay
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Since My Biological Didn't Bother
Last year, my father sent me a “Happy Father’s Day” text message. It might have been the funniest, yet most ironic text message that I’ve ever received. I didn’t reply. I couldn’t think of an adequate response; that “Eat a dick” response was waiting in the draft folder though. If it’s not obvious by now,…
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On Being A Grown-Ass Man…With A Pair Of Jordans
(Damon’s latest at EBONY tells the story of how he recently bought a pair of $200 basketball sneakers he’ll never, ever, ever actually play basketball in) I’m not who you’d call a sneakerhead. I like shoes as just much as the next bougie Black man, but I’ve never been the type — at least not…
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An Ode To Felicia A. O'Dell And All The Black Dramatics We Love
Hi. My name is Alex and watching Soul Train clips on YouTube is one of my favorite procrastination methods. I wish I could jump in the Magic School Bus and heel-toe back to a time when Black and Black-loving America gathered ‘round on Saturday mornings to witness well dressed Black people, jamming on the motherfucking…
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Hi. I'm A Writer. And I Suck at Scrabble.
Whether you love or hate my literary canon balls, they contribute to the overall canon of literacy. There are canons both to the left and right of them. You can hear the volley and thunder. Hell, I am the world renowned, verb, adjective, adverb, pronoun, preposition…really I could do this all day. I mean it…
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Six Things No One Tells You About Your Wedding Day
1. You will not eat. Ok, this is a lie. Several people who’ve gone through this process before warned us there wouldn’t be much time for eating. But, since we believed we’re special little snowflakes and shit, we ignored them. After all, the venue we chose was specifically chosen because of their brunch menu. What’s…
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The Burden Of Writing (And Reading) While Black
“I don’t burden myself with the impossible task of writing the “Black Woman’s” experience; to be honest, I think categorically-Black writing loses a lot of nuance and is generally lazy. I just tell my own stories and hope somebody feels me.” This was a small part of a longer exchange I had with a VSB…
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On Bachelor Parties And Blackouts
(Editor’s Note: After some thought, I’ve decided to change the title, edit out the hashtag, and remove the references to Jada. Don’t want to be seen as capitalizing on what that girl has had to go through. D. Young) It started with Bellinis. We got there at 2:30. The bottomless was ending at 3. So, in order…
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Damon Is Getting Married. And I Couldn't Be Happier.
In case you didn’t know, Damon is getting married. In less than a week from now, he and the Gay Reindeer (I have no idea how he types that out multiple times…I felt ridiculous just now) will be a distinct, legally binding unit held to the laws of the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania. By the way,…
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Street Harassment: The Black Girl's Bat Mitzvah
Ask any Black woman you know, and she’ll probably tell you street harassment has happened to her. Ask any teenage Black girl you know, and she probably thinks it’s supposed to. Street harassment, in its own sick way, was the way I figured out I wasn’t a little girl any more. Even though, at 15…