parenting
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My 3-Year-Old Tried to Set Me Up. He Is Clearly Cracking Under the Pressure of This Global Pandemic
I love my kids. I really do. They’re a riot when they’re not trying to end me. Or when they’re not forcing me to listen to songs I’ve learned to hate over and over again. They’re a complete hoot when I don’t step on their shit in the middle of the night. This global pandemic…
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Netflix's Uncorked Reminded Me of a Fun Story About Unconventional Support From My Father
Since we’re all stuck (or should be) inside the house for the foreseeable future (despite various projected goals for peak contagion and flattening curves—shoutouts to the homies Dr. Fauci and Dr. Birx, y’all some real ones), the amount of movies and television shows being watched is about to put Netflix on par with Earth, Wind…
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The Dads of The Root Provide Some Insights Into Their New, Shut-In Realities
The coronavirus has most of us staying inside the house—if possible—and that’s creating some new realities for our country. Parents are becoming teachers as well as employees while having to learn time-management skills. People who never want to leave the house under normal circumstances are itching to hit the CVS for nothing other than some…
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I'm Glad You're Going to Write the Great American Novel While We're All Shut-In but I Have Little Kids
It feels like months ago when word started coming down that the coronavirus might shut down our whole lives for weeks, maybe even months. Turns out it was really, like, last week when the “stay your ass at home” hammer became a real thing. Of course, as soon as that happened, the charge to “use…
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How to Survive Working From Home—With Kids
In an effort to stop the coronavirus from spreading, Amazon, Spotify, Google and Facebook are among the many corporations telling their employees they’re better off working from home. And while I watch many of my typically office-based friends jump for joy at the prospect of no longer having to leave their homes to travel on…
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Thanks to My Kids, I Hope to Never Hear ‘Who Let The Dogs Out’ Again. I’ll Probably Listen to It Again This Afternoon
We’ve been down this old town road before. A few months ago, my wife and I took my two boys to Monster Jam, the traveling monster truck competition and demonstration show during its Washington, D.C. stop. One of the trucks, Monster Mutt, comes out to Baha Men’s 2000, Grammy-award winning (!!!!!) cover, “Who Let The…
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Stepping on Shit in the Middle of the Night: A Discourse on Parenting Little Children
I’d like to be one of those parents who can say that my kids have never heard me use profanity. But I can’t do that. In fact, if you live within a mile of my house, it is highly likely that if you have kids, they’ve heard me use profanity. Stepping on shit my kids…
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If You Piss Off My Youngest Kid, the Way His Petty Is Set Up, You Are Absolutely Not Coming to His Birthday Party
You know, as I watch my kids grow, I’ve come to the realization that, in life, the 3-5 age range is really the sweet spot. For kids, it’s the age before they are required to know better and thus do better so they can pretty much say anything they want (short of curse words around…
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'I Have Not Had One Regret': Oprah Reveals Her 'Aha!' Moment About Marriage and Kids
Life is full of hard choices; some with bigger payoffs or sacrifices than others. But as Oprah tells People, not choosing to “have it all”—“all,” in this instance, meaning career, marriage, and kids—hasn’t felt like a sacrifice to her; not that she didn’t consider it. But in People’s Oct. 21 Women Changing the World issue,…
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Once, Twice…Seven Times a Daddy? Future Named in New Paternity Suit
A Florida woman has filed a paternity case naming Future as the father of a 4-month-old girl. If true, the child would be the rapper’s seventh. TMZ reports that Eliza Seraphin—known on Instagram as Eliza Reign—filed documents in Broward County, Fla., claiming Future fathered her baby girl and then promptly ghosted on her shortly after…