news
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Access Hollywood to Trump: Nah, Son. That’s You on the Tape (I’m Paraphrasing a Bit)
Access Hollywood is not here for President Donald Trump’s games. The insider tabloid show has come out to emphatically state that the voice heard on the infamous 2005 tape that captured Trump telling then-host Billy Bush about how his celebrity allows him to sexually assault women is authentic. According to a piece published in the…
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Trump Hosted an Empty-Chair Meeting After ‘Chuck and Nancy’ Told Him to Kick Rocks
Let’s recap, shall we? President Shoofly von BotherEveryone was supposed to host a meeting with Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer (D-N.Y.) and House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) to discuss preventing a possible government shutdown. Before the meeting, President DoucheFace von FrostedTufts decided that it would be a good idea to tweet how ineffective and…
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Who’s Surprised? April Ryan Not Invited to White House Holiday Party for 1st Time in 20 Years
April Ryan, the black woman the White House loves to hate on, will not be going to the scary White House white-walking winter wonder-klan for its annual Christmas party—for the first time in 20 years. The NAACP tweeted the news Wednesday morning, saying that Ryan was not invited. The veteran White House correspondent, who recently…
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New Documents Reveal FBI Secretly Monitored Protests, Feared ‘Black Supremacist’ Attack
Newly released FBI and Department of Homeland Security documents reveal that federal law-enforcement agencies worried that violent “black supremacist extremists” would kill police officers, attack the Democratic National Convention and cause chaos at the Republican National Convention last year. Even though they could find no evidence or substantial proof, federal agencies monitored black organizations and…
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Diamond Reynolds, Girlfriend of Philando Castile, Reaches Settlement With City of St. Anthony, Minn.
It’s been more than a year since Philando Castile was shot and killed in St. Anthony, Minn., mere seconds after being pulled over by then-Police Officer Jeronimo Yanez. Now Castile’s girlfriend, Diamond Reynolds, is finally reaching some sense of closure after reaching a settlement with the city of St. Anthony. According to WCCO-TV, the four-member…
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Spelman Grad Bringing Prince George’s County, Md., Its 1st Medicinal-Cannabis Dispensary
At 25, Hope Wiseman is set to become the country’s youngest black female owner of a cannabis dispensary. The medicinal-cannabis dispensary, Mary and Main, will open in winter 2018 in Prince George’s County, Md., and will offer a variety of products and therapy treatments. With a recommendation from a registered physician in hand, customers can…
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President Trump Is the Single Biggest Threat to Muslims After Sharing Islamophobic Videos on Twitter
On Wednesday, for no apparent reason other than that he’s a xenophobic piece of garbage who openly hates an entire religious group with a passion seen only by white men wearing hoods (or khakis) and wielding torches, the president of the United States retweeted Islamophobic posts from Britain’s far-right, fascist party, Britain First. The videos,…
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Something Smells Catfishy: Ray Allen’s Alleged Male Stalker Claims They Had a 3-Year Romantic Relationship
This whole thing is becoming intensely messy. Former NBA superstar Ray Allen claimed that he’d been catfished by a man pretending to be several women. In court documents obtained by TMZ Sports, Allen claims that upon learning that it was, in fact, a man behind the online dating profiles, he ended the relationships. Now the…
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Trump and CNN Are Having a Messy Public Breakup; Now CNN Isn’t Going to the Christmas Party
President Yahoo von Hotmail has ruined his relationship with mainstream media and, most especially, his lover CNN. On Tuesday, the news station announced that it wouldn’t be attending the annual White House Christmas party because President LooseLips von TweetBeef won’t stop talking bad about the press. “CNN will not be attending this year’s White House…
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Police in Florida Arrest Suspect in Series of Killings in Tampa’s Seminole Heights
Police in Tampa, Fla., have apprehended a man believed to be connected to four killings that have raised fears of a serial killer in the Seminole Heights neighborhood. According to WTSP-TV, 24-year-old Howell Emanuel Donaldson III is being charged with four counts of first-degree murder. Donaldson was taken into custody Tuesday after officers responded to…