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The Myth of the Black Male Trump Supporter
The following fairy tale is based on a true story. Once upon a time, in a kingdom not so far away, an evil orange emperor ruled the land. With a face resembling an orangutang’s hind parts (except for the chalky ovals encircling his eyelids) and golden windswept hair dyed like jaundiced straw, the king earned…
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An Exclusive Interview With the Second-Least Racist Person in the Room at Last Night's Debate
In our neverending quest to bring you exclusive content related to the upcoming election, The Root managed to score an interview with a man who, by all accounts, was widely known as the least racist person who attended Thursday night’s match between WWE RAW (Wypipo Working to Elect a Racist-Ass Wombat) champion Donald Trump and…
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The Root's Clapback Mailbag: Scotts and Prayers
Every week, I come on here to complain about the haters. But as Maya Angelou once said: “Every day, I thank God for indoor plumbing, toilet paper and haters. Because, without them, I’d have nothing to shit on.” Or maybe it was Will Smith. Although the visualization of that quote might make your mouth salty,…
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Here's What Will Happen After Election Day
This is the second half of our two-part series predicting the likeliest scenarios for the 2020 election and its aftermath. Who will win the 2020 presidential election? When will we know who won the 2020 election? What happens if the results are challenged? Who in the hell left the gate open? Was it the same…
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Here's What Will Likely Happen on Election Day: Part 1
On Tuesday, November 3, 2020, America will choose the next president of the United States. Maybe. The 2020 election is fraught with more unknowables than any other election in American history. Not only do we not know whether Donald John Trump or Joseph Robinette Biden Jr. will serve as America’s next president, but we also…
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Unqualified Impunity: Amy Coney Barrett Once Ruled That a Cop Wasn't Responsible for a Black Teenager's Death Because Breathing Isn't a Constitutional Right
Amy Coney Barrett is a right-wing extremist. She does not believe George Floyd had a right to breathe. She doesn’t believe that screaming the n-word is necessarily “hostile.” She does believe in Jesus, though. While Judge Barrett has displayed a Mitch McConnell-like ability to evade direct questions about her legal opinions on a woman’s right…
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The Root's Clapback Mailbag: No Vaseline
Break’em off… Just waking up in the morning, gotta thank my bossfor giving me a day just to respondTo DMs and tweets from fuckwadsWho read our blog and get mad because we do our jobWhen we point out racism, Caucasians flip outThey troll us in the grays, but can’t get outSo they get real mad…
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Try Jesus, Not Karen: Amy Coney Barrett and the Utterly Untouchable White Woman
Jesus was just a metaphor. Whether or not one believes in the story of Yeshua ben Yosef as miracle or mythology, we can all agree on three things: He had rock hard abs. He was the best person to be around when you ran out of wine. He was expendable. If God actually sent his…
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Remember America?
I bet you miss her. Enduring these last four years of hate, ineptitude and chaos has created a new longing for a return to the old America. The next few weeks leading up to the 2020 election will be filled with people who want to go back to the coronavirus-free, more tolerant America that they…
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The Root's Clapback Mailbag: Yesterday
Today, there is no lede. Yesterday, the staff at The Root received this email From: MattTo: The Root Good afternoon, I love The Root, and you’ve got a great community of regular commenters on your site, but (as I’m sure you’ve heard plenty about) you have quite a few regular and not-so-regular trolls stirring up…
