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Jury Awards Man $15 Million for Spending 20 Years in Prison for a Crime He Didn’t Commit
A federal jury awarded a Baltimore man $15 million after he spent more than two decades wrongly incarcerated for murder. Sabein Burgess sued the Baltimore Police Department and two detectives for his wrongful conviction for the 1994 murder of his then-girlfriend Michelle Dyson, according to the Baltimore Sun. Burgess was released from prison in 2015…
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Retired Alabama Police Officer Says She Was ‘Told to Watch’ Roy Moore Around High School Cheerleaders
A retired Gadsden, Ala., law-enforcement officer says she and her fellow officers were told to keep Republican Senate candidate Roy Moore away from the high school cheerleading team because it was known that Moore preferred young girls. Faye Gary, a former police officer, told MSNBC that everyone in the small Alabama town was aware of…
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The Caucasian’s Guide to Black Thanksgiving, Part 3: Giving Thanks
Dearly beloved white people, Today we are gathered here among our cousins, aunts, uncles, nieces and nephews to celebrate the tradition called Black Thanksgiving. We have already informed you about the invited guests, so you should be familiar with all of the people in attendance. Black Thanksgiving is a holiday based on family and love,…
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Richard Spencer Told to Kick Rocks After Farm Owners Realize They Were Hosting a Super-Secret Wypipo Meeting
A white supremacist bigot brunch was canceled midway through on Sunday when the owners of a Montgomery County, Md., farm realized that “alt-right” agitator and unverified tweeter Richard Spencer was behind the event. According to the Baltimore Sun, the National Policy Institute, Spencer’s “think tank,” rented Rockland Farms to host about 100 people for a…
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The Caucasian’s Guide to Thanksgiving, Part 2: The Menu
Welcome back, white people! (I bet you’ve never heard anyone say that before.) After learning about the guest list for Black Thanksgiving, you might be wondering why Black Thanksgiving is so different from wypipo Thanksgiving. As you learn more about Thanksgiving, many of you will say: “This is almost exactly like white Thanksgiving, but not…
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An Open Letter to Post Malone
Dear Mr. Malone: First let me say that, as an old-school hip-hop head, I will refrain from criticizing your music. I will not comment on your lyrical genius of rhyming “shottas” with “grrra-ta-ta-ta.” I won’t even mention how your synthesized, Auto-Tuned, Caucasian half-singing on “Rockstar” sounds as if T-Pain fucked a Pinterest page. I am…
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Charles Manson’s Race War, Explained
On Sunday, Nov. 19, Charles Manson, the man who inspired a mass killing and is often referred to as “Original Recipe Richard Spencer,” was called home to be spit-roasted in the eternal damnation of hellfire after a fruitful life filled with hate, bloodshed and forehead-swastika-carving. Until Sunday, he was the evilest man alive (apologies to…
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Oh, the Irony! Apple Replaces Black Diversity VP With a White Woman
I am not saying that God, the universe, Rihannayoncé or whoever you worship as a higher power is petty, but in one of the most hilarious twists of fate ever, Apple’s vice president of inclusion and diversity, Denise Young Smith, who once whitesplained how hiring 12 white, blond, blue-eyed men could actually be seen as…
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Anti-LGBTQ Lawmaker Caught in His Office Having Extremely Pro-LGBTQ Sex With a Man
An Ohio Republican legislator who campaigned on “family values” and fought against LGBTQ rights has resigned after he was reportedly caught having sex. In his office. With a man. According to Newsweek, a few months ago an “observer” encountered the patriotic state Rep. Wes Goodman in his Columbus, Ohio, office at the Riffe Center, planting…
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The Root’s Clapback Mailbag: Not All Mailbags
Today’s Clapback Mailbag is dedicated to last week’s mailbag. I know this sounds like some Inception-level shit where we make references to a mailbag inside a mailbag about the mailbag, so I will include some new stuff, too. Last week was a rough week for mail. I feel like you guys weren’t bringing your racist…
