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Clowns Recognize Clowns: Antonio Brown Working Out For The Saints
You just really have to admire the NFL’s dedication to clownery. What else can explain Antonio Brown’s possible return to the league? NBC Sports reports that Antonio Brown is working out for the New Orleans Saints as they head into the playoffs. Brown seemingly confirmed this news after he posted a picture a workout waiver…
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Trump Spends Morning Rage-Tweeting About Impeachment; Still Not Worried Though
The morning after Christmas is typically a nice one for me. I spent mine playing some of the games I copped on Xbox over Christmas, eating leftovers and chilling with my dog. It was a pleasant morning, all things considered. Apparently, the same cannot be said for the President who spent his morning being pissed…
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New Study Suggests Transgender People Understand Their Gender Identities From Youth
Today in news that is inexplicably going to piss off a particular segment of people, a new study has shown that transgender kids may have an understanding of their gender identity at a young age. NBC News reports that a study in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences shows that transgender youth are…
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Today In Hotep Foolishness: Boyce Watkins Comes for Lizzo
It is undeniable that Lizzo has had one hell of a year. Her 2017 song “Truth Hurts,” hit No. 1 on the charts, she was the musical guest for Eddie Murphy’s acclaimed SNL return and she scored eight Grammy nominations, proving that she is indeed 100% that bitch. Yet because she is a black woman…
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Arizona DHS Agents Allegedly Paid for Sex With Trafficking Victims
In September 2018, a group of agents from the Department of Homeland Security announced that they had successfully broken up a ring of illegal massage parlors that targeted Asian immigrants and forced them into sex slavery. One of the key things they forgot to add, though, was that two of their agents had allegedly paid…
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Snitch of the Year Runner-Up Rudy Giuliani Says 'I'm More of a Jew than Soros Is'
Perhaps seeing that his crown for dropping dimes was being snatched by Toshiba Sixty-Nine, Rudy Giuliani saw fit to come out his mouth and say some more wild-ish. In an interview with NY Mag, Giuliani is quoted as saying “Don’t call me anti-Semitic if I oppose him. Soros is hardly a Jew. I’m more of…
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DNC Tightens Eligibility Requirements for January Debate
The debate field might be getting a little less crowded next month as the DNC announced new requirements for getting on the stage. CBS News reports that for candidates to appear at the January 14 debate they must reach 5% in at least four national polls or 7% in two polls in the early-voting states…
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Report Accuses Washington State Rep. Matt Shea of Domestic Terrorism
Apparently, 2019 refuses to have any chill. You’d think that with it being one of the last weeks of the year, the holidays coming up and your boy having to work through the disappointment that was The Rise of Skywalker that the wilding could at least come to a temporary halt. Yeah, nah. NPR reported…
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Nick Cannon Drops Third Diss Track
Tonight millions of film-goers around the world will bear witness to the conclusion of the 40-year-old Skywalker saga. Fear not though, for as one saga concludes another has continued. I’m speaking of course about actor/game show host/Louis Vuitton Sub-Zero, Nick Cannon and his one sided beef with Eminem. On Friday, TMZ reported that Nick Cannon…
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Former Kentucky Governor Ignores Science; Pardons Child Rapist Because Victim's Hymen Was Intact
Matt Bevin, former governor of Kentucky and sentient piece of garbage has come under fire for pardoning 41-year old Micah Schoettle. Schoettle was sentenced to 23 years on charges of rape, incest, and sodomy. His reasoning? The 9-year-old victim’s hymen was intact. Slate reports that Bevin, who was recently defeated by Democrat Andy Beshear, has…
