• Spouse May Nix Visit With Son's Absent Dad

    I am married to a wonderful man, and we have a child together. He loves my oldest son like his own and has been in my son’s life since he was 2. After four years, my ex now decides that he wants to see my child and wants me to let my son come over…

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  • Black Men: Afraid of Successful Women?

    The “men are intimidated by successful women” story is always touted as a reason many women are single. I didn’t believe it at all until it sort of happened to me recently. I’m in my early 20s, not discouraged but shocked. What’s your experience and take on this? —T.D. The truth about partnering is that…

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  • Trayvon Martin Is Not the First and Won't Be the Last

    In her column at Essence magazine, relationship expert and The Root contributor Demetria L. Lucas checks in on the Trayvon Martin case, listing the names of other black men who were harassed, brutalized or murdered in the U.S. and concluding that Martin likely will not be the last. Forgive me, I take serious issue with…

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  • Do I Have to Go to Strip Clubs With My Man?

    Women shouldn’t want to watch their man stuff money down some woman’s G-string or wherever. There’s just nothing sexy or entertaining about that. I guess it beats my man, when I have one, doing it behind my back. But are women really expected to actually want to go to the strip club with their man…

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  • The Smear Campaign Against Trayvon Martin

    At her A Belle in Brooklyn blog, The Root contributing editor Demetria L. Lucas takes on commentators who seem to think that Trayvon Martin’s blackness made him a threat even though he was unarmed: “They killed my son and now they’re trying to kill his reputation,” Trayvon’s mother Sybrina Fulton told reporters on Monday. Officially,…

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  • How Do I Help Him Survive a Layoff?

    I’m scared for my relationship, Belle. My boyfriend was laid off last year and is now having financial problems, and he seems depressed. It’s causing us to argue a lot. I try my best to be supportive and loving, but he just seems like he’s giving up on everything. He says it’s not me, but…

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  • Piers Morgan and Touré: A Clash of Egos

    At her Belle in Brooklyn blog, The Root contributing editor Demetria L. Lucas congratulates Touré, who slammed Piers Morgan Friday on his own show, Piers Morgan Tonight, over the mishandling of an interview with George Zimmerman’s brother, Robert, the previous night. Short story, and I promise this is going somewhere. Eons ago, I studied abroad…

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  • Should I Break Up With 'Mr. Right Now'?

    How do you summon the strength to end a relationship with a guy when you are really into him, but you can see that it won’t go to the altar? It’s great for now, but I can’t see myself with him long term. Every time I try to say something, I chicken out! Help! —L.E.…

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  • Not African Enough in Africa

    In a personal essay at Clutch magazine, The Root contributing editor Demetria L. Lucas reflects upon the way her Americanness made her stick out in South Africa. On my only excursion to the Motherland, I landed in South Africa only because a close friend from Brooklyn, by way of the Mid-West, decided she’d had enough…

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  • Are Long-Distance Relationships Worth It?

    I’m contemplating a long-distance relationship but don’t know if I should. Should I? —N.C. Um, not a lot of details for me to give a specific answer to your question, but I’ll try. Admittedly, I’m not the biggest fan of long-distance relationships. When friends or clients ask me if they should pursue getting to know…

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