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Eight Signs You're "Just Black" Even Though You Believe You're "New Black"
New Black fever has continued to spread. It started last year with Pharrell’s interview with Oprah where he spoke of a new Blackness that doesn’t transcend race and culture as much as it attempts to make it obsolete. Since then, several celebrities — including Raven Symone, Kanye West, and (most recently) Common — have spoken about how…
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No News Story Has Ever Made Me Happier Than The News About Leah Still
Last night, while watching TV with The Wife Person and scrolling through Facebook on my phone, I came across a story about Leah Still, the four-year-old daughter of Cincinnati Bengal Devon Still. If you recall, Leah’s battle with pediatric cancer made national headlines last year, in large part due to her father’s pre-surgery “pep talk”…
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How It Feels To Get Your Ass Kicked In Spades
There are many benefits to living in Pittsburgh. There are literally thousands of places to get great breakfast food, the topography is completely unique and completely spectacular, and it’s surprisingly close to Toronto. Unfortunately, a robust nightlife for Black people is not one of them. If you’re a 30-something Black person in this city and…
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Um…Shouldn't Power Get A Royalty Check From Empire Now Too?
The “Blurred Lines” verdict likely won’t signal the end of the music industry. Although I agree that it set a bad precedent, I doubt it’s going to lead to a world where the only music not in danger of facing a copyright suit is made in the shower. But, if we are going to go there —…
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Five Types Of Post-Racial Racists You Will Definitely Meet
The most telling part of the SAE fraternity chant caught on camera — well, the most telling part aside from the tuxes and gowns, because nothing says “it’s time to do some racist-ass shit” like Tuxedo Junction Groupons — is the fact that this song was perfect. The words, cadence, and rhythm were a perfect fit…
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Draymond Green Summarized The Entire Black Experience In Five Seconds
At the beginning of the interview, he is every Black American trying to do the right thing. Every worker catching two trains to work this morning. Every parent dropping their kids off at school. Every husband agreeing to go weekend toaster shopping even though the toaster they currently own works perfectly fine. And then, something…
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The Worst Part Of The DOJ's Report On Ferguson
We know that the Department of Justice will continue to investigate the Ferguson Police Department. And, if Ferguson doesn’t adhere to whichever changes the DOJ orders them to make, they will face some type of consequence. We know we’ll use the empirical evidence of the systematic racism in Ferguson to continue to fuel our own…
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Ben Carson Is The Dumbest Motherfucker Alive
I do not care that Benjamin Solomon Carson, Sr. graduated from Yale and became the director of pediatric neurosurgery at John Hopkins when he was 33, the youngest ever in that position. (For comparison’s sake, at 33, I was still saving my cups from Panera Bread — leaving with them instead of throwing them away, keeping…
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Yeah, Bill de Blasio Is Trolling The Hell Out Of Internet Conservatives
Look, I’d be lying if I said I’d heard of either Eid al-Adha or Eid al-Fitr before today. But since, according to Schools Chancellor Carmen Farina, hundreds of thousands of New York City public school kids are Muslim, it makes perfect, logical, and practical sense to close schools on the days these holidays are observed. This isn’t…
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Who Is Full Of The Most Shit In Regards To Penis Size?
After examining over 15,000 people — men ages 17 to 91 in Europe, Asia, Africa, and the United States — researchers have determined that the average erect penis length is 5.14 inches. This, and other findings of this study, means many people are up to their necks in bullshit. Who exactly is up to their neck in bullshit?…
