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10 People the Newly Finger Waved Katie Holmes Looks Like
The Grammys happened Sunday night. Bruno Mars won everything, Jay-Z won nothing and Rihanna made everyone pregnant. Basically, business as usual. Except it wasn’t. Because Katie Holmes—who is one half of Hollywood’s second-most “I guess they really are together, huh?” couple (Laura Dern and Baron Davis are the standard-bearers there)—came out to present an award…
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It’s a Week Before the Super Bowl, and the Biggest Story in Sports Is a … Draft for the NBA All-Star Game?
Football is still America’s most popular sport. And the NFL our biggest and most popular sports league. But while the NFL’s status as the king of America’s sports hill remains, I don’t remember its position ever being as precarious. To wit, each of the biggest NFL-related stories of the year has been extremely unflattering to…
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Being a Contrarian Just to Be a Contrarian Just Makes You a Sheep With Bad Timing
I’m not sure if anything will top the “Hitler had some talent, tho” hill that some of y’all’s friends and cousins are choosing to die on this week. And I say this as someone who has chosen some extremely peculiar hills—including the “Pancakes are better than waffles” hill, the “New Kanye’s music is better than…
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Want to Be a Better White Person? Learn How to Be a Guest
My first (and only) visit to the National Museum of African American History and Culture almost didn’t happen. My wife and I drove to Washington, D.C., after biking from Pittsburgh to Cumberland, Md., on a four-day and 150-mile trek that I still plan to write about eventually, but remain too traumatized by to write about…
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J. Holiday Leaps Out of His Unmade Bed of Irrelevance to Criticize Beyoncé, SZA and Cardi B for Disrespecting Black Men
Out-of-season-Avirex-bomber-jacket-repurposed-into-a-dog-blanket-with-sentience J. Holiday apparently received a Google alert this week to remind people he was still alive. Because that’s the only logical reason why he’d think it prudent to somersault out of his waterbed to hop on Instagram and talk hypocritical shit on some of the biggest names in music: Beyoncé, Cardi B, SZA (all…
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Maybe Kyrie Irving’s 3rd Eye Really Could Predict the Cavs’ Future
Those who follow the NBA know that you’d be wise to take any Adrian Wojnarowski reportage on anything LeBron-related with a grain of salt. For reasons that remain unclear, Wojnarowski doesn’t miss opportunities to craft stories about LeBron James in ways that are less than flattering. That said, it’s hard not to be fascinated by…
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The 10 Blackest Things About This Kid’s Journal Entry Roasting His Teacher for Lying About Christopher Columbus
1. The matter-of-fact way he states, “Today was not a good learning day.” Which, in this context, is the equivalent of starting a sentence with, “But I just think it’s kinda funny that … ” 2. “I only wanted to hear you not talking” is probably the best burn I’ve heard since Morgan Freeman’s character…
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Hey Guys, Can We (Men) Please Stop Trying So Hard to Convince Everyone That We’re Stupid?
Budd: Larry, there ain’t nobody out there! Larry Gomez: “There ain’t nobody out there … Larry.” What’s your point? That you’re not needed here? Budd: My point is, I’m the bouncer … and there ain’t nobody out there to bounce! This passage, of course, is from Kill Bill: Vol. 2. It occurs toward the beginning…
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This Painting of the Obamas as Janet and Tupac From Poetic Justice Is the Blackest Thing I’ve Ever Seen This Week
When I was a kid, my dad used to make a Kool-Aid concoction he’d call “Kool-Aid wine.” It was reserved for special occasions—Thanksgivings, birthdays, Super Bowl parties, that time Cops was in Pittsburgh (and on our block!) and we invited people over to watch, etc.—and many of my favorite childhood memories are connected to it, as…
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10 Reasons ‘Ghosting’ at an Event Is 1,000 Times Better Than Saying Goodbye
Earlier this week, Slate republished a Seth Stevenson piece from 2013 extolling the virtues of the “Irish goodbye”—which is what happens when you just leave an event without saying bye to anyone. And I have never read a piece that resonated more with my soul. If I were single, I’d slide all up into this…
