president vladimir trumputin
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TrumPutin’s Vacation Plans Have Small NJ Town Worried
Because President TrumPutin can’t stop vacationing, an entire town in New Jersey is shaking in its boots after learning that 45 may be taking his vacationing ass to one of his golf resorts as nasty Mar-a-Lago closes for the hot season. Trump is expected to make the Trump National Golf Club in Bedminster, N.J., “a…
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1st Look at President Vladimir TrumPutin’s New Staff
Nothing says good ol’ American racism like these three: Kid Rock, Sarah Palin and Ted Nugent. For some reason, maybe because the president is a big ol’ conspiracy-theorist-loving colostomy bag, he had these three over in the White House. No, they aren’t President TrumPutin’s new staff, although they probably have the same IQ. I mean,…
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TrumPutin Won’t Like This: Tom Brady Skipping White House Visit
When the Super Bowl-winning New England Patriots make their visit to the Orange House on Wednesday, arguably the most important player and friend of President Pee-Pee, quarterback Tom Brady won’t be there. Brady cited the president’s overall fuckery and disregard for men, women and children of color as the reason he won’t be making the…
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Here’s What Hillary Clinton Said After Learning She’d Lost to TrumPutin …
A dejected and distraught Hillary Clinton wanted to walk out and congratulate newly anointed Dictator in Chief Vladimir TrumPutin on his 2016 election victory, but her top aide Jake Sullivan wouldn’t hear of it. “Look, I really just want to concede gracefully, wish him the best, thank everybody and get off the stage,” Clinton told…
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We Are on the Brink of War With North Korea and Trump Is at Mar-a-Lago, Again!
This president is the most vacationing-ass president in the history of presidents. His orange ass has been in office fewer than 100 days, and in that time he’s gone on seven trips to his Mar-a-Lago resort in Florida. Seven! Currently, when his orange ass isn’t tweeting random shit or dropping the “Mother of All Bombs”…
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‘Concrete and Corroborative Evidence of Collusion’ Between Trump Associates and Russia, Source Says
We all know that President Vladimir TrumPutin is in bed with Mother Russia. Whether it’s photos of 45 with Russian hookers or Russia’s cable-installation bill for an extra cable box in the basement of the White House with the RT News package, we all know that something is amiss when it comes to Russian ties…
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Stay Woke: While the US Was Bombing Afghanistan, Trump Was Secretly Signing Bill to Block Planned Parenthood Money
President Vladimir TrumPutin is a lot of things, but camera shy isn’t one of them. Since taking office, he’s had the news crews around him every time he’s signed one of his 1,000 executive orders. Yet, on Thursday, as news broke that the U.S. had just dropped the “Mother of All Bombs” on an Afghanistan…
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Syrian President Claims He Didn’t Use Chemical Weapons Against His Own People. Then Who Did?
Now, this is getting interesting. Syrian dictator Bashar Assad claims he didn’t use chemical weapon against his own people, and adds that any reports claiming that he did are fake news. “One hundred percent fabrication,” Assad said in an interview with Agence France-Presse. Assad also claims that his nation “gave up” all of its stored…
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Mar-a-Lago’s Kitchen Is Nasty; Cited for 13 Violations Days Before Japanese Prime Minister’s Visit
Florida restaurant inspectors found 13 violations inside the kitchen of President Vladimir TrumPutin’s Mar-a-Lago playhouse just days before the dictator hosted Japanese Prime Minister Shinzō Abe. Let’s hope the Japanese prime minister didn’t order the fish, considering that the inspectors cited Mar-a-Lago for housing potentially dangerous raw fish, the Miami Herald reports. The resort was also…
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Trump’s Interview With Fox Confirms He’s Still Obsessed With Hillary Clinton
Since President TrumPutin’s playbook only includes lying, mentioning Hillary Clinton and blaming Barack Obama, it’s safe to assume that if the president has a sit-down interview with fake-news Fox, you can bet he’s going to do one of the three, if not all of them. Thankfully, TrumPutin doesn’t disappoint, unless you expect him to be…