Of Course, the GOP Convention Is Heading to the End of America’s Digestive TractFlorida is the asshole of America.ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 10, 2020
Tim Scott, the Lone Black Republican Senator, Tasked With Coming Up With GOP's Police Reform Plan, and I’m Not MadThe only thing Kentucky Sen. Mitch McConnell (R) could tell me about is how he lives in the sewer with his three…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 10, 2020
What Could Possibly Be Going Wrong With Primary Voting in Brian Kemp’s Georgia?When I was young, I had a friend named Luck. He was called Luck because he did a bunch of rotten shit and never got…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 9, 2020
Trump Believes the 75-Year-Old Man Pushed to the Ground by Buffalo, NY, Cops May Have Been an Antifa OperativeBy now, we’ve all seen the horrific footage of 75-year-old Martin Gugino being shoved to the ground by two Buffalo,…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 9, 2020
Donald Trump Jr.’s Mongolia Trip to Kill an Endangered Sheep Costs Taxpayers Nearly $77,000I don’t know where Donald Trump Jr. lands on the asshole scale but I have to assume it’s pretty high. Like, I don’t…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 9, 2020
Nancy Pelosi and 'Nem Just Introduced Sweeping Police Reform Bill While Wearing Kente ClothWhile the Trump administration is considering holding a nationwide speech on race and national unity, (yes, you read…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 8, 2020
Ben Carson Says Protesting NFL Players Should Say They Love America; Colin Kaepernick’s Mom Claps Back With ReceiptsThe doctor of Housing and Urban Development, Ben Carson, is a fucking idiot. Maybe it’s not his fault. Maybe he’s…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 8, 2020
Colin Powell Is Voting for Joe Biden and You-Know-Who Went Into an Orange RageFormer Secretary of State and noted Republican Colin Powell is voting for Joe Biden in the upcoming presidential…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 8, 2020
Texas GOP Calling for Chairwoman’s Resignation After She Claimed George Floyd’s Death Was StagedI mean…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 5, 2020
There Are Really Only 2 Kinds of People: Those of Us Who Are Against Lynching and Kentucky Sen. Rand PaulOn the day of George Floyd’s memorial service, Kentucky Sen. Rand Paul just couldn’t pass up the moment to be an…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 5, 2020
Trump: Yes, I Went Down Into the Bunker but I Was Just Checking the Food Rations for Hot FriesWhen I was in elementary school and the bully was messing with me, I would do this thing where I would go to the…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 4, 2020
White-on-White Violence: Piers Morgan and Rudy Giuliani Engage in the Worst Verszuz Battle EverI don’t know what started it, and truthfully, I don’t care. But at some point during an interview between antifa and…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 4, 2020
NY Rep. Eliot Engel Caught on Hot Mic at George Floyd Press Conference: ‘If I Didn’t Have a Primary, I Wouldn’t Care’This has been a rough time for politicians.ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 4, 2020
Snapchat Will No Longer Promote Trump’s Content; Facebook Still Being the Kid Rock of KanyesIf Twitter and Snapchat are Jalen Rose, Facebook is Jason Whitlock.ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 3, 2020
Defense Secretary to Trump: Are You Bugging? We Aren’t Using the Military Against ProtestersFor days, President Trump has been threatening to use military force to stop peaceful protesting in the name of…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 3, 2020
From the Ashes of Mike Brown Protests, Ella Jones Becomes Ferguson’s 1st Black and 1st Woman MayorOn August 9, it will have been six years since Mike Brown’s death. Some six years ago, Ferguson, Mo. became…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 3, 2020
Iowa Rep. Steve KKKing of Racism Loses Republican PrimarySteve King, the longtime member of the “I don’t understand how saying that whites are God’s favorite people is…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 3, 2020
Oh, We Holding Up Bibles? Nancy Pelosi Holds the Good Book While Asking Trump to Become Healer-in-ChiefNot like this, Nancy Pelosi. Please, not like this.ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 2, 2020
Biden Comes for Trump’s Saggy Throat: 'I Won’t Traffic in Hate and Fear'—Unless It’s Trump, Because I Hate Him (OK, I’m Paraphrasing a Bit)Former Vice President Joe Biden is tired of Trump’s hateful and divisive speech. He’s tired of Trump speaking out of…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 2, 2020
The Punk-Ass President Had Peaceful Protesters Tear-Gassed So He Wouldn’t Look Like a Bunker BitchPresident Archie Bunker (but more racist and less likable) heard all our jokes about him hiding as police clashed…ByStephen A. Crockett Jr.PublishedJune 2, 2020