Every Black Thanksgiving has a set menu that rarely changes from year to year. With all of the essentials such as mac’ n cheese or collard greens, there are also a few given dishes that get the serious side eye when they appear on the table.
We don’t know what the white folks do over there but over here? We eat sweet potato pies, not pumpkin pies. We eat mac n’ cheese without breadcrumbs. We’d also prepare dishes in their original recipe versus throwing together several ingredients into a casserole.
If something new appears on the table, it may go untouched or you might be put on blast by the one cousin who shouts, “Who brought potato salad with raisins?!”
If you’re debating on what to bring to Thanksgiving this year, consider this list of 17 things not to bring and save yourself from the shame of returning home with the food you brought.
Stuffing, Not Dressing
Don’t offend me. The two may appear similar but they are NOT the same. Give me dressing or nothing at all.
Green Bean Casserole
Amongst the several polls I sent out requesting ideas for this list, this abomination was at the top. The only acceptable form of green beans is with smoked turkey neck and potatoes. Why is it a trend to make this a casserole?
Mashed Potatoes
This may be debatable, but trust…you’ll never find this in my household. We have other things to hold gravy. Enter: rice, dressing, and of course, turkey.
Pumpkin Things
I don’t have anything against pumpkins for the rest of the Fall/Autumn season, but on Thanksgiving? This is strictly a sweet potato household. If I bite into a pie and it’s pumpkin, we might have to fight.
Canned Greens
As a little girl, I sat in the kitchen snapping green beans and watching my grandmother clean the collards. You think I don’t know the difference between fresh and canned vegetables?
Boxed Gravy
We can tell the difference. There are too many leftover greases and turkey juices for you to not be able to make a gravy. Leave that flavorless roux home.
Beyond Meats
On any other day, I will embrace vegan alternatives. But please don’t play with my pork chops and turkey wings.
Spaghetti
Are you crazy? Your kids have been eating spaghetti for the past week and that’s what you bring to the feast of feasts?!
Broccoli-Cheddar Whatever
I get it. Tis’ the season to embrace all variations of broccoli-cheddar dishes. But do us a favor and leave your lunch for work in the fridge.
Soup
Why?
Sugar- or Gluten-Free Sweets
This is the one time of year to not be shy on the sugar and gluten. Even if you’re trying to be conscious of the one guest who has a dietary restriction, please, let the rest of us enjoy ourselves.
Fruit Cake
The main desserts include pie, cobblers, banana pudding and maybe a pound cake. If you walk in with a fruit cake, you will also leave with that fruit cake.
Creamed Spinach
Why? You’re better off bringing artichoke dip for us to snack on while we wait for the food. No one is putting this on their plate.
Pizza
If you walk through the door with a double cheese pepperoni stuffed crust pie, trade your “Happy Thanksgiving” for an apology.
Vegetable Trays
If you didn’t allot enough time to cook, just say that. I’ll starve all day till 4 p.m. instead of snack on raw carrots and broccoli. At least bring a char-whatever-it-is board.
Boxed Wine
Why would you come in this house with this excuse of a wine? If you cheap just say that.
Whatever You Know You’re Not In Charge Of…
Every family has the one relative they can count on for a prominent Thanksgiving dish. If grandma makes the mac n’ cheese every year, please don’t consider this your moment to play Hell’s Kitchen.
Straight From 
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