I assume Halle Berry has friends. That there are people not on her payroll that can look into those million-dollar eyes and say, ''Girl, keep it moving'' or the converse, ''Girl, keep your man.'' So last week when the contract on her relationship with longtime beau/baby daddy Gabriel Aubry ended, I figure the actress had already workshopped the idea and came out the other side with one gorgeous man edited out.

But in the final cut of Ms. Berry's love life, the marquee will always read, ''Why Can't Halle Berry Keep A Man?'' in monstrous flashing lights. Very rarely do ticket-holders (the folks shelling out good money or too much free time for a front seat to someone else's grief) ask the more obvious question, ''Why Can't A Man Keep Halle Berry?''

''Anyone who continues to pick the wrong man time after time has issues. She needs to stop dating and start to heal and fix herself FIRST,'' e-shouted one commenter from the soapbox of the Huffington Post. Another agreed, ''It's time to stop the self-pity and victimization game, and square up with the truth.'' Over at The YBF a commenter summed up her feelings in nutshell, ''Why Halle gotta be a nut case?''

True the common denominator in all of Halle Berry's relationships is, in fact, Halle Berry. People magazine lists four official couplings for the Oscar winner since 1992: athlete David Justice, actor Michael Ealy, singer Eric Benet and model Gabriel Aubry. Four men in 16 years? That's being ''unlucky in love''? By contrast George Clooney, the perpetual poster child for eternal bachelorhood, has had nine, according to People.

So far, Aubry has had nothing but kind words for his famous ex. ''She is, and will forever be, one of the most special and beautiful people that I have ever known, and I am certain that we will continue to have only love and respect for one another,'' said the True Religion model in a statement released through his agency, Wilhelmina Models. And for her part, Berry looked more than single and ready to mingle at a recent charity event in New York and playing beachside in California with the couple's daughter, Nahla. But paying customers don't want to hear about joint custody.