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The planning started soon after Election Night. And now the hopes of young, single black men and women are pinned to inauguration week. The goal for the degreed and pedigreed: to find their very own Barack or Michelle.
When searching for those adjectives that best capture the inauguration of the nation’s first black president, old standards come to mind—“historic!” “momentous!” “unprecedented!”
Add to that venerable list “intellectual Freaknik” and “meet market for buppies,” because among the millions attending this weekend’s revelry are plenty of single, young black men and women looking to hook up while witnessing history.
The plans started to come together by midday on Nov. 5, 2008. Plane tickets were bought. Ball gowns were fitted. And hopes were pinned like wilted corsages to the big event ,where degreed and pedigreed black folks, raised on the impossible standard of The Cosby Show, might find their very own Barack or Michelle, real-life incarnations of every ‘80s baby’s fantasy.
One of my good friends, Bari, has ingeniously dubbed the days surrounding Barack Obama’s swearing-in “Freaknik for Folks with Degrees,” a nod to the massive gatherings of black college students that took place in 1990s Atlanta. Bari, who has a BA, MBA and JD behind her name and a “Mrs.” in front of it, sees the Obamas as “the standard-bearers for black love.” She wished everyone Godspeed this weekend.
Dru, another friend, said “If anything, Obama gives every dude an easy pick-up line this weekend.” We can only imagine what that might be, something like: “Hey, wanna take a look at my economic stimulus package?”
Thankfully, most are optimistic that “the ‘naug” will turn out to be more than just All-Star Weekend with graduates instead of groupies.
Leave it to my buddy, Faraji, who’s earning a master’s degree from MIT and fancies himself hilarious, to analyze the situation this way: “Many professional blacks are optimistic about the prospects of attending a mass event where they can network, meet potential mates and enjoy themselves unencumbered by street fights, shootings and packs of young hooligans in Coogi sweaters harassing women.”
Despite the fact that it was Cosby that made Coogi the sartorial symbol of black elite back in the ‘80s, for most the standard will be a little bit higher this coming weekend.
Andrea, an investment banker traveling from London, described this year’s inauguration as “the can’t-miss black networking event of the century.” Everybody who’s anybody—or those wishing to be somebody—will be there, she said.
“And if I’m honest with myself,” added Mitchell, “I’m attending because a tiny piece of the little angel sitting on my shoulder is hoping that in D.C. there is anybody, somebody… for me.”
Her friend, Naima, a doctoral candidate at the University of California at Los Angeles, is preparing for the best. “I’m putting a little more effort into my outfits, a little more thought into what parties I go to and I am doing a few more sit-ups,” she said.
Count me among the throngs ready to grab a piece of the new black American dream, including a side of marriage and babies with that high-powered career.
Once it was clear that the next first lady would be Mrs. Obama, my own prospects seemed that much more promising. As my best friend, Gina, puts it “Michelle is making it super famous to be a black woman” with an advanced degree. Now it seems we have an Excel spreadsheet packed with potential opportunities—a happy hour here, a champagne brunch there.
And although the practice of using black professional mixers, conferences and conventions as a sort of dating voir dire is nothing new—at least in today’s climate of dipping marriage rates—the Obamas have raised the stakes considerably.
According to Andrea, “we are witnessing a sociological paradigm shift where a loving black nuclear family is the new definition of cool.”
The hope for Andrea and women like her is that the crowd of eligible and educated black men in Washington this weekend “will be reminded that smart, driven, nurturing black women have always been—and will always be—the business.”
Another, perhaps surprising, side effect of the search for one’s very own Barack Obama is the actual shrinking of expectations among black women. The 44th president of the United States, after all, started his political career as a community organizer. Today he’d be making around $30,000 a year, according to Salary.com.
“Michelle met Barack when he was ‘low’ on the totem pole,” said Naima. “He had a studio apartment and a beat-up car, but they clearly saw the potential in each other.”
If it’s potential that people are looking for this weekend, there will be plenty— finding it won’t be the problem, recognizing it might be.
Helena Andrews is a regular contributor to The Root.
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Despite the fact that it was Cosby that made Coogi the sartorial symbol of black elite back in the ‘80s, for most the standard will be a little bit higher this coming weekend. free online games
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vandiemen wrote:
"How was Barack a low man on the totem pole when Michelle met him?"
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Michelle herself went to Princeton and Harvard, so why would the fact that Barack went to Columbia and Harvard have been particularly impressive to her, or made it obvious that he (at that time) was an especially great catch, rather than merely meeting the bare minimum of being on her level of accomplishment? Sure, a double-Ivy resume is quite impressive, but it's not quite as impressive when everyone in your social circle has roughly equivalent credentials, and a woman of Michelle's socio-economic status would primarily be looking at these kinds of men, rather than the entire class of (Black) males. From this perspective, it becomes clearer that compared to this professional class, rather than the set of all men, it probably wasn't obvious that Barack was especially impressive or on track to be President of the United States.
Think of this way: There were probably ~150 Black law students at Harvard Law when Barack was there. Assuming that only a third were male, that would mean ~50 Black men, many of whom likely had comparable or even more impressive resumes than Barack had as a first-year student (before he was EIC of HLR). So it likely wasn't obvious then, although one could probably have made the argument, that Obama was going to end up where he is, or that he was a cut above the rest.
Then factor in that there were probably men about the same age as Obama who had law degrees from Harvard, Yale, Stanford, Chicago, Northwestern, Michigan, etc. who were already working at Michelle's firm and others in the area and who probably didn't have holes in the bottom of their cars. Some of them probably were fairly impressive in law school. Why would one think, at that time, that Barack was higher rather than lower on the totam pole compared to these other bright and accomplished men?
Barack's life's subsequent path has shown that he is remarkable. But how obvious would it have been when he was a first-year summer associate with a hole in the bottom of his car?
How was Barack a low man on the totem pole when Michelle met him? He had just finished his 1st year at HARVARD LAW! So what if he wasn't loaded with money at that point, he had an extremely bright future ahead of him and was already extremely accomplished.
You are the VERY EXAMPLE why racism will never die-I hope you have no children that you are teaching such ideas to. I would love for you to name one ancestor of yours in history in the last 200 years that was subjected to slavery by the White Man were you ever denied a drink of water? To use a toilet? Did you even vote before our "mixed race" of Mr Obama became president?
TO YOUR PEOPLE? Are you kidding me? AA people are some of the most racist people I know!
And yes, I am married to a successful proud Black Man-who is disgusted by people with such ideals as yours.
You Patra have every opportunity on planet earth as everyone else has! Black-White-Asian-Hispanic-Green or Purple! Stop playing the Victim of things that you have never experienced nor will ever experience in your lifetime.
Barack married a women that has integrity and does not hide behind false excuses like "BALME IT ON THE WHITE MAN" Let me remind YOU sista, He is half white!
You are the VERY EXAMPLE why racism will never die-I hope you have no children that you are teaching such ideas to. I would love for you to name one ancestor of yours in history in the last 200 years that was subjected to slavery by the White Man...were you ever denied a drink of water? To use a toilet? Did you even vote before our "mixed race" of Mr Obama became president?
TO YOUR PEOPLE?...Are you kidding me?..AA people are some of the most racist people I know!
And yes, I am married to a successful proud Black Man-who is disgusted by people with such ideals as yours.
You Patra have every opportunity on planet earth as everyone else has! Black-White-Asian-Hispanic-Green or Purple! Stop playing the Victim of things that you have never experienced nor will ever experience in your lifetime.
Barack married a women that has integrity and does not hide behind false excuses like "BALME IT ON THE WHITE MAN"...Let me remind YOU sista, He is half white!
PLEASE explain why a man needs "swagga"? What ever happened to good ol' SELF-CONFIDENCE?
My partner has a good friend who doesn't wear suits everyday (because he doesn't HAVE to-yes black people we don't have to overdress!), but always looks respectable with a dress shirt, tie and well-fitting dress pants. He lives in Bklyn and never gets a second look. However, one day, in a rush to get somewhere he decided to go straight home from the gym, sweats & all, and was mobbed! It was the same man, same 'swagga', same everything-but all of a sudden, baggy sweats made him 'fiiinnne'.
Ladies, can we please stop looking for the "Harvard grad that also is a rapper with a baby face" rediculousness? Why can't he just be NORMAL? Why are we always looking for that aggressive 'swagga', a "man that can handle me"? How about you handle yourself, & just look for a good guy? All that swagga stuff looks STUPID when you are 45 or 50.
"Second, if you are the type of woman who insists on a "time frame" before sex...know that if he was sexual before he met you, he will be sexual during your imposed "time frame" with someone else."
Are you suggesting that women might as well go ahead and sex with him, because if she doesn't, someone else will?
To be successful, we must be willing to give up momentary false pleasures of the flesh and reach for a higher, more moral goal. Sex outside of marriage should be a no-no for everyone, especially for black women. Case in point, let's reread what Furious_styles had to say concerning women waiting before she gives "it" up:
"If you are the type of woman who insists on a "time frame" before sex, (30, 90 days, I've heard 6 months before) or something like that...know that if he was sexual before he met you, he will be sexual during your imposed "time frame" with someone else. Ask yourself if you are okay with that."
I am okay with that, because I am not desperate enough to be with a man who can't control his hormones and is willing to fornicate with whomever because I have morals. If that is you, do you. But, as a Christian black woman who doesn't feel as though she has to sleep with a man to keep him, my advice to women is if a man keeps pressuring you for sex without making any type of long term commitment to you, count your "losses" and keep stepping. No matter how educated he is, that is NO excuse for compromise and immorality.
I rather have Godly singleness than to engage in a sinful sexual relationship because of fear of what my man may do behind my back.