(The Root) — Last night Single Ladies fans — and hate-watchers — witnessed a thigh-clenching doctor's appointment, a roll in the hay, frozen assets, a guest appearance from Eve and three of the finest men on television on the season's second episode, "I Didn't Mean to Turn You On."
Fresh off her first dating experience after her divorce, April (Charity Shea) meets a new guy at the roller skating rink. Later she discovers — during a Pap smear (awk!) — that he just so happens to be her gynecologist, too. Actually, he turns out to be more like a cunning linguist.
How well does Doc inspect her va-jay-jay? Let's just say, he's very passionate about his work — in and out of the doctor's office — and it proves to be way too much for April. Going Brazilian below the belt is one thing. But April gets spooked when the shiny object in a pretty box he gives her isn't some blinged-out piece of jewelry. Instead it's a Kegel device used for toning and tightening her lotus flower. "It was just too much of a good thing," she says later to her incredulous girls Raquel (Denise Vasi) and Keisha (LisaRaye McCoy).
Raquel, on the other hand, has rediscovered how good it was with her first love, the horse-stable hunk, Antonio (William Levy). (If the face looks familiar, Levy competed on Dancing With the Stars earlier this year.) She ends up rekindling a very flirty relationship with him during a horseback-riding outing with her besties.
Later their chemistry heats up so much, they start fooling around in the barn loft. Just when it's about to get good, here comes Raquel's mother and a few of her snooty equestrian matriarchs walking in on their canoodling session. Womp, womp. (Don't worry — the couple gets some private time among the hay bales later in a softcore love scene that was a few close-ups short of being on Cinemax After Dark.)
Mother is not happy with Raquel hooking up with Antonio or with her daughter's flaky life and career choices. But Raquel stands up for herself, saying, "I'm cleaning house in every facet of my life and getting rid of anything that gets in the way of my true passion." The fashion bug has bitten her. In Raquel's next big leap of faith, she decides to buy out Val's (Stacy Dash) half of the clothing store, which adds that final bit of closure to the fact that the Clueless star has officially left the building. Raquel convinces Eve, the shop's co-owner, that she's got the passion to make their new business partnership work.
Meanwhile, Keisha (LisaRaye McCoy), who has found herself in a bind when her bank accounts are wiped out, gets her ex-boyfriend-attorney, Sean (Terrell Tilford), to help her deal with the $200,000 she owes the IRS. But it's her current flame, Malcolm (D.B. Woodside), who eventually shows up like Superman to save Keisha from her debt. Clearly threatened by Sean's having come back into the picture, Malcolm puts up the cash.
He may wear an "S" on his chest when it comes to finances. However, later that night, when Malcolm goes back to his tricky ways and reveals he's still sending money to his ex-wife in the Ivory Coast, the "S" might just as easily stand for "sneaky" or "sucker." Keisha promptly gives him the boot!
Perhaps this means that sexy Sean will stick around for a few episodes. After the kiss that he planted on Keisha, who knows if Malcolm is ready for some real competition? Sean might invoke a special kind of attorney-client privilege to get his girl. Here's hoping that there'll be some steamy scenes between them next week.
Erin E. Evans is a writer in New York. Follow her on Twitter.