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The Original Black Man's Guide to the Press
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Posted By:
pinhead at 05/12/2008 11:10:56 PM
Comment:
My first reaction was "OMG this is freaking brilliant!!" but then I had to check the rest of the BlackPeopleReactionTM to see if if was okay to say that. -
Posted By:
Freedom_Jury at 05/12/2008 6:45:21 AM
Comment:
Obama = Hillary = McCain = prohibition packing prisons. Wake up, vote for Wayne Root, the Libertarian candidate.
http://www.rootforamerica.com
If you don't vote for Root, then when Obama builds the new DEA office in New Orleans that he has suggested, all of the innocent blood that is spilt and incarcerated will be on your hands. Hillary and McCain are the same --both drug warriors as much as Obama is.
Or at least know your rights as a juror, here: http://www.fija.org and your rights as a citizen, here: http://www.flexyourrights.org
And so you don't think I'm wasting your time, I just got out of a traffic ticket, by asking for a jury trial (I sent the ticket in with the "jury trial box" selected, in some states it's different), self-representing, and using "voir dire" questioning to prevent the jury from being stacked against me, with the info at http://www.fija.org
If you want to end the racism of the system, you need to end racist policy, and laws that are easily enforced on the basis of race. Root is the only one even talking about the issue, noone else has a clue.
http://www.lp.org -
Posted By:
rebelx2g1 at 05/10/2008 5:29:56 PM
Comment:
I am assuming this was supposed to be a satirical editorial
.....you definitely missed the mark
It's those same "Original Black Men" the mastered that "Guide", that are responsible for Barack Obama being able to be in this position....Additionally, we MUST thank those WHITE college students in IOWA....who were secretly reading the "Original Black Man's" books, and listening to the "Original Black Man's" oratory (i.e. Press Conferences), and actually agreeing with them....And as we can see...the only people affected by Rev. Wright "Original Blackmaness", were YOU TWO...obviously, someone must have agreed with Rev. Wright....because Hillary Clinton barely escaped with a win in Indiana...(SEE opening comments at the top for reason why she barely won Indiana)
Furthermore, were it not for the "Original Black Man"....YOU TWO wouldn't even be wholeheartedly supporting a black man to lead this country anyway...you would have been criticizing him.....(and as a side note in history... after J. Edgar Hoover...ALL THE PRESIDENTS, secretly listened to the "Original Black Man"....See "Bill Clinton, America's First Black President?") so before you sit down to write off-kilter humor about the Wright's and Farrakhans of the world...let's thank them first, because without them.... YOU TWO wouldn't even have gotten a nod from the Washington Post to even use their server to write this crap.....
thank God for those so-called "Original Black Men".... -
Posted By:
rebelx2g1 at 05/10/2008 5:12:29 PM
Comment:
I am assuming this is supposed to be a satirical editorial?
.....definitely missed the mark. -
Posted By:
dhibb at 05/09/2008 12:03:21 PM
Comment:
Preach Brother!
Can I get a copy of the book and a bean pie to go:)
By the way... the Willie Lynch letters are fake?:)
Keep up the great work!!! -
Posted By:
dmac225 at 05/07/2008 4:36:49 PM
Comment:
Unless you immigrated here from Africa you ARE NOT African-American. When blacks in this country decide to quit being African victims and start being American citizens then perhaps they will make progress. -
Posted By:
Chasechance at 05/07/2008 6:23:22 AM
Comment:
I don't know what made me laugh most -- this article or the title of Cobb's upcoming book on Kwame Kilpatrick. Keep up the good, and insightful, work Pearson and Cobb! -
Posted By:
Chasechance at 05/07/2008 6:01:04 AM
Comment:
Hilarious and so on point! Please send it to all the talking heads on cable and network news. -
Posted By:
perkl8tr at 05/06/2008 6:32:06 PM
Comment:
I love the article. The audiousness of this article alone is revolutionary. If I had two more rules in include 11 if you will.
11) Always remind White people you are the moderate. That is if you think my thoughts, actions, professions are radical, you need only check with the Brothers and Sisters of the African Underground. (You will literally see the little bit of color they may have leave their bodies as their brain computer tries to process the words, "AFRICAN" AND "UNDERGROUND" -
Posted By:
perkl8tr at 05/06/2008 6:31:07 PM
Comment:
I love the article. The audiousness of this article alone is revolutionary. If I had two more rules in include 11 and 12 if you will.
11) Always remind White people you are the moderate. That is if you think my thoughts, actions, professions are radical, you need only check with the Brothers and Sisters of the African Underground. (You will literally see the little bit of color they may have leave their bodies as their brain computer tries to process the words, "AFRICAN" AND "UNDERGROUND".
12) Remind them, their opinion of the facts ultimately doesn't matter and you're only doing the speaking engagement to take their money. : - ) -
Posted By:
gsham at 05/06/2008 12:30:37 PM
Comment:
very entertaining. I wish this was reprinted in the black press so more people could read it. -
Posted By:
Jams at 05/05/2008 11:45:38 PM
Comment:
There was a 2008 amendment...
When accused of racial bias, count out the drops of your blood that belong to other races, nodding out the implication that these magic drops of blood somehow inoculate you against racial bias. If possible, slip in reference to slavery.
P.S. Brilliant Article -
Posted By:
rhp at 05/05/2008 9:39:21 PM
Comment:
horse *** -
Posted By:
mike the builder at 05/05/2008 7:57:47 PM
Comment:
That was the funniest article i Have read in some time. I laughed all the way through. Very enjoyable!!!!!!! -
Posted By:
mike the builder at 05/05/2008 7:56:49 PM
Comment:
That was the funniest article I have read in a month. It was great. I enjoyed it from start to finish!!!! -
Posted By:
Ches at 05/05/2008 6:57:25 PM
Comment:
He is running for president! You're Not That stupid are you? He Was Raised by He's white Parents! He is Half White! Calling him African-American is in itself Racist! By way of the one drop rule! Made by the most racist of all-time. Obama is very Patriotic and Loves His Country! Don't let the media fool you! -
Posted By:
Billy Pilgrim at 05/05/2008 6:09:45 PM
Comment:
In Downtown LA, of Ceasar Chavez, there is a barbeque place, Babeque King. The is a big sign, full color, "The Barbeque King Loves America" There is an eagle and the Stars and Stripes. This declaration of love for America, and his good cooking, qualify him to be President of the United States. Why cannot Barak Obama declare HIS love for America? I hear the distain in his voice and actions. I would want a man that didn' LOVE my sister to marry her. Does Obama love America? w has he shown his love? -
Posted By:
Billy Pilgrim at 05/05/2008 6:00:34 PM
Comment:
In downtown LA, off Ceasar Chavez, there is a Barbeque place, "Barbeque King" its run by AfricanAmerican originally from Texas or the South. There is a big sign, "Barbeque King Loves America" with an eagle and the Stars and Stripes. My point is you don't have tpo be white to love America. But, you have to love America if you want to be President. Obama is smart, well spoken and a good husband. Great. If only he loved America, then, he could be President. -
Posted By:
sinzen007 at 05/05/2008 5:12:45 PM
Comment:
I thought you satire was brilliant! Each one of your guidelines was on point, and you cleverly raised many of the same ideas floating around on the edges of my consciousness. The real point of the Rev. Wright issue is, the stirring up of white fear the same fear that brought us this insipid war on terror, and the slow pearing down of American civil liberties. I think anyone who is truely analyzing the candidates, knows in their heart of hearts. That Senator Obama is by far the best canidate, his mission is to stay focused on what brought him this far. Those who harp on Rev. Wright were looking for racially "safe" or politcally expediant cover not to vote for Obama. -
Posted By:
savory1 at 05/05/2008 4:50:42 PM
Comment:
Wright is a nut plain and simple. If he was an actual God fearing man he would have turned the other cheek. He is selfish and self centered and he was invited the the National Press Club on the invitation of a black female Hillery supporter, where is the outrage? Just another example of one black person taking down another. -
Posted By:
Newsman22 at 05/05/2008 3:15:54 PM
Comment:
The controversy over Jeremiah Wright is just bovine defecation spread wide. It is interesting to see how black folks who are standing on the sholders of "crazy loons" like Wright are now rushing to distance themselves from him because he has held up a mirror to America's face. In reality this is not about Wright; it is about Obama being lynched with the Wright switch and with the approving applause of quite a few blacks to wit! -
Posted By:
Newsman22 at 05/05/2008 3:09:25 PM
Comment:
This is a load of sophiscated crap. The controversy over Jeremiah Wright has less to do with him than that a section of right wing media tried to lynch Obama using the Wright switch, with the overt support of a more than few confused blacks who think they have made it into the great house from the fields.
The clear distortionof Jeremiah's words to serve a political purpose supports the fact that there is an deliberate and evil intent to "keep black people in their places". -
Posted By:
therockofages at 05/05/2008 1:39:44 PM
Comment:
The 'message' has become so hypocritical and double-standard, other equally important ethnic groups have grown weary of the daily dose of 'we have it tougher than anyone else'. -
Posted By:
sumpingrey at 05/05/2008 1:12:34 PM
Comment:
LOVED IT LOVED IT LOVED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVED THIS ARTICLE. -
Posted By:
sumpingrey at 05/05/2008 1:11:50 PM
Comment:
I LOVED THIS PIECE!!!!!!!!!!!! LOVED IT LOVED IT LOVED IT. -
Posted By:
verycherry at 05/05/2008 12:25:37 PM
Comment:
Thank you...my son is named Jelani...a 'powerful' piece of satire, which includes truth...to be irreverent, you'd have to revere what you're criticizing. Great work.
I'm from Detroit originally...Kwame (sigh)...plz include his mama's influence (extensively) -
Posted By:
jabreal00 at 05/05/2008 11:24:00 AM
Comment:
The sarcasm was lost on me. The humor is a bit too sophomoric for me. -
Posted By:
neutrinocatcher at 05/05/2008 10:32:55 AM
Comment:
This article is a jewel of humor and humanity. I'm glad I clicked on the link from Slate. -
Posted By:
neutrinocatcher at 05/05/2008 10:32:19 AM
Comment:
This was so wonderful and so funny. I'm glad I clicked on the link from Slate. -
Posted By:
Sophie at 05/05/2008 9:47:57 AM
Comment:
"Smile and be gracious even as your eyes suggest you are about to go Nat Turner out this piece."
I hd to laugh out loud because that was hilarious! -
Posted By:
Li Po at 05/05/2008 8:13:14 AM
Comment:
We continue to define people by the color of their skin because there is in this country a gaping socioeconomic chasm between whites and blacks that was caused by slavery. Until we own up to that, and the problems it has caused, we will never heal this country. -
Posted By:
seamus at 05/04/2008 5:54:37 PM
Comment:
Very cute. I assume that Mr. Farakkkan keeps his copy of these rules next to his copy of the "protocols of the elders of zion". -
Posted By:
Allemanni at 05/04/2008 12:59:33 PM
Comment:
I remember, at the beginning of the Obama campaign, that the networks hauled out a number of "black leaders" who questioned Obama's black credentials ("he wasn't black enough" or "didn't have the true African-American experience"). My reaction: what does that mean?
Our world is a very diverse quilt. Listening to or making statements about "White America" and "Black America" is idiotic. There are certainly concentrations of various black and white subcultures, but no one person reflects the values or mores a race. In fact, values and mores aren't dependent on skin or eye or hair color.
When "black leaders" make reflexive statements like those above, what they seemingly forget is that no one person can speak for an entire ???race??? (such as it even exists). Obama - a man who was raised by his white mother off this continent ??? is obviously not the typical ???black??? person ??? but neither are Jeremiah Wright, Oprah Winfrey, Maya Angelou, Colin Powell, Michael Jackson, Malcom X, Bill Cosby, Rosa Parks, or Tiger Woods. Why do we continue to define people by their pigmentation? It???s 2008, I???m so disappointed???I???m afraid I???ll die without seeing an end to this shame. -
Posted By:
johnson at 05/04/2008 12:35:16 PM
Comment:
Great piece! I've already pre-ordered my copy of "What Had Happened Was". -
Posted By:
AprilLynn at 05/03/2008 2:21:41 PM
Comment:
This was by far the funniest thing I've read all week! I mean, laugh-out-loud funny! I mean, pee on myself funny! Just when I was ready to throw my shoe as MSNBC's coverage of the "Wright Issue", you've saved the day! -
Posted By:
zinjanthropus at 05/03/2008 10:30:49 AM
Comment:
Just don't expect me to feel guilty about what my great-great-great-grandfather did to your great-great-great-grandfather. The past is dead and gone, so stop living in it. On the other hand, it seems that a lot of current events are off the table (like why is that blacks commit murder at a rate 6-7 times that of whites?)
Let's make a Typhoon- I won't mention what your great great grandfather might have done to my great great grandfather if you stop living in denial about the realities of today. Whites benefit from a legacy of advantage and the privelege of non bias. I don't need to mention my great grandfather when Abner Louima, and Sean Bell are staring you in the face. These are just a couple of easy names. Yes they are a result of prejudiced behavior that is the legacy of your great great grandfather. But your great great grandfather is off the table too.
If the past were truely dead and gone, there wouldn't be such a double standard regarding how the press deals with every nuance of every association with Black candidates yet gives passes regarding relationships among White candidates. Bush-white citizen's council. Bush Saudi Family, McCain-Hagee...
Remember Jessie Jackson being asked on network television during his presidential campaign "Are you American first, or are you Black first?" It's idiotic questions like this PLUS your idiotic reaction to what you think you know about ONE Black preacher that make me mention your great great grandfather's legacy of ignorance. Where you ignore reality, ignorance festers. -
Posted By:
Typhoon McGoon at 05/02/2008 12:35:40 PM
Comment:
Funny column! Good commentary on the racist free pass given to black hate-mongers and mudslingers by the (largely white) "news" sources which coddle and attempt to legitimize them.
>>It is apparent that any discussion that makes some in "White" America,
>>which you call "mainstream American" uncomfortable with our country's
>>history is off the table.
It's not off the table. Just don't expect me to feel guilty about what my great-great-great-grandfather did to your great-great-great-grandfather. The past is dead and gone, so stop living in it. On the other hand, it seems that a lot of current events are off the table (like why is that blacks commit murder at a rate 6-7 times that of whites?)
>>The issues Reverend Wright discussed in his sermon are serious
>>and not marginal.
Marginally intelligible. Seriously paranoid. Seriously racist. Seriously stupid. Let's face it, the guy's an arrogant moron too ignorant to be aware of what a fool he truly is. But I'm glad that Wright spewed his poison, and I'm glad that it hung like an albatross around Obama's neck, because that's what it took to finally make white Americans stand up and say "ENOUGH" to the non-stop stream of hate and racism that whites have been subjected to by blacks in the last 20 years.-
Posted By:
Kim Pearson at 05/02/2008 6:40:27 PM
Comment:
Our article was a joke that in no way supports your specious claim. We have each written serious pieces on Dr. Wright and TUCC. Jelani's most recent article is here: http://www.ebonyjet.com/politics/national/index.aspx?id=7275 . I wrote this in March, 2007:http://www.blogher.com/node/17236 and this in March, 2008: http://www.blogher.com/patriotism-wrights-jeremiads-and-michelle-obamas-pride -
Posted By:
ldavis at 05/02/2008 2:24:37 PM
Comment:
It's not off the table. Just don't expect me to feel guilty about what my great-great-great-grandfather did to your great-great-great-grandfather. The past is dead and gone, so stop living in it. On the other hand, it seems that a lot of current events are off the table (like why is that blacks commit murder at a rate 6-7 times that of whites?)
Its interesting that you mention a statistic (murder rate) without citing your source. No one expects you to feel guilt over the actions of your great-great-great grandparent, only to acknowledge the actions of your great-great-great grandparent. That being said, I hope that you don't expect me to feel guilt over the actions of Jeremiah Wright or (as you so graciously pointed out) my murderous bretheren.
Jeremiah Wright's comments made me cringe, as did Pastor John Hagee's comments. For every comment Lewis Farrakahn makes, David Duke has a reply. Why should Jeremiah Wright be an "albatross around Obama's neck"? By that same logic, John Hagee should be John McCain's albatross. Barrack Obama attended Pastor Wright's church to hear God's word: Peace on Earth and goodwill to all mankind. The Bible doesn't make many references to race, creed or color. Its a shame that Pastor Wright and Pastor Hagee have chosen to abuse his position in the church to further polarize our people.
You say that white americans have been subjected to 20 years of hate and racism...try being subjected to hate and racism for generations! Again, no one is telling to feel shame for the actions of others...only to acknowledge them.
I doubt that we will see another comment from you on this page, but I would genuienly be interested in the statistic that you mentioned in your comment...the one about the murder rate. How was the study done? What year was it published? Who sponsored this study?
-
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Posted By:
mike at 05/02/2008 11:55:53 AM
Comment:
lol at corperate america paying black people to hate on they own. TheRoot is becoming very suspect. -
Posted By:
bylinediva at 05/02/2008 11:39:30 AM
Comment:
yup. what citizen politician said.... -
Posted By:
Mr John at 05/02/2008 11:03:52 AM
Comment:
It's ironic that most black people have no idea as to how Rev. Wright wound up capturing so much column real estate. Had he never written the letter to the NYTimes in March 2007 critizing the work of Jodi Kantor and the newspaper he would have been just an asterisk along the political highway. It is sad that it took this incident to see what republicans have been telling me for years. I now view the TIMES with a jaundiced eye as well as with a lot more skepticism. It is sad but there is some truth in this irony. -
Posted By:
easmachine at 05/02/2008 8:54:10 AM
Comment:
Man I am STILL laughing at your article. What makes it so good is that it is so true. A black man in America will never go broke talkin trash about the white man. It is unfortunately also true that white folk continuosly give our fist raising ice grillin brethren the ammunition to do so. Our problem is that we have always poked fun at massa from (slave quarters to the suburbs), and sometimes forget that we are not in one of our own little us-ONLY meetings and massa finds out that Shine and Stackolee wear Armani have BAs in BS.
Briliant analysis. -
Posted By:
Italian Revolutionary at 05/02/2008 8:31:49 AM
Comment:
The proposition that people can walk if their Pastor is on the "What?" side of personal religious belief is an indication that some people may be ignorant of the fact that in many denominations, "Pastor Shopping" is either frowned up or a tenet of faith. In many catholic parishes, membership is based on address, not personal inclination. If my memory serves.
Garibaldi
BTW this is a seriously hilarious article... -
Posted By:
Citizen Politician at 05/02/2008 8:29:53 AM
Comment:
I would like to note that Reverend Jeremiah Wright's "tirade" is not out of the mainstream. I am an American who a descendant of African slaves, just like Reverend Wright. My ancestors predate that arrival of most of the so-called "mainstream" media pundits ancestors. In fact many African-Americans like myself and Reverend Wright can trace our ancestry in this part of the world to the colonial period. I am tired of the opinions of African Americans are minimized and disregarded.
We do not have to agree with everything someone states, I do not agree with several of Reverend Wright's points on the state of African-Americans in America. But I do agree with many of his points on United States history and international policy.
It is apparent that any discussion that makes some in "White" America, which you call "mainstream American" uncomfortable with our country's history is off the table. The issues Reverend Wright discussed in his sermon are serious and not marginal. Perhaps if there was a real dialogue in this country people would be proud of the results that came from the suffering faced by the descendants of African Slaves. This experience molded a significant portion of our nation's history, culture, and economy.
The 14th and 15th Amendments to the Constitution provided an untold amount of rights that millions of European immigrants enjoyed, while African Americans had to wait a hundred years to be welcomed as full fledge citizens. In addition the Civil Rights Acts of the 60s provided rights to all subsequent Americans, not just African Americans. Women of European descent gained significant social gains in our economy. Also, slave trade provided the United States economy with a significant competitive advantage economically provided to the economic elite to invest in the Industrial Revolution. So I would hardly call the opinions of African Americans "marginal", "radical", or ???divisive???.
I would like to recommend two articles for further research on the Reverend Wright ???issue???:
"Uh-Obama: Racism, White Voters and the Myth of Color-Blindness"-By Tim Wise: http://www.lipmagazine.org/~timwise/Obama.html
???The Rev. Dr. Jeremiah Wright and the Audacity of Truth??? By Dr. Wilmer J. Leon III: http://www.truthout.org/docs_2006/032208F.shtml -
Posted By:
spiker at 05/01/2008 8:06:37 PM
Comment:
Here's some more human truth:
http://www.luoamerican.com/baldilocks/2008/04/finally-ive-fin.html?cid=112910722
"Finally, I???ve finished listening to all of the Moyers interview and the batty NAACP address by Barack Obama's pastor of twenty years, Jeremiah Wright. And, in addition, I rewatched that display of ego, half-truths???aka falsehoods--and mundane bad manners from Fox that first ran live yesterday morning. And, of course, I listened to the original sermons which brought the reverend's teachings under large-scale public scrutiny. Could you have put up with Wright???s posturing in the pulpit for twenty years? Confidence and peacockery can be entertaining as long as you know and are consistently reminded of where the focal point is???or, in this case, ..." Use link to read the rest.
If it isn't human truth then it is Christian truth. -
Posted By:
spiker at 05/01/2008 8:04:33 PM
Comment:
Finally, not black truth or white truth but just human truth.
Here's to coming together over human truth and not false truths.
Peace. -
Posted By:
stargazr at 05/01/2008 3:25:12 PM
Comment:
HIL-AR-I-OUS!!!! lol!
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