What's Next? Straight Black Women Should Marry Each Other?

Writing at Clutch magazine, The Root's contributing editor Demetria L. Lucas offers a sarcastic riff on the latest advice to single African-American women: that they should consider bisexual men as romantic partners. Here's what she says might be next.

... Unfortunately, it's probably too late for all of you, especially if you've wasted prime husband-hunting years getting a diploma when you should have freed up your time to find a man by getting a GED. All the hetero Black men alive and even not yet born have, are now or will be planning to marry White women. And because in the history of mankind no desirable man of any other color has ever been really interested in a Black woman as a wife, you're left only with one hope for marriage: women.

Yeah, I said it. Single Black women should marry each other.

Think of the benefits: you'll be married!!! You'll be married!!! You'll be married!!!

This will work out well for lesbians because you know, all this time ya'll have been settling for women because you couldn't keep a man. But for the rest of you, it's time to "turn" yourselves gay. It can't be that hard since the millions-strong LGBT community just rolled over one morning when they hit puberty and decided to go against the grain. You can too!

Just go on and roll over.  Roll, dammit!

Now call your bestie, get on the plane and head to the nearest courthouse in one of the nine states where gay marriage is legal and jump that broom.

Read Demetria L. Lucas' entire piece at Clutch magazine.

The Root aims to foster and advance conversations about issues relevant to the black Diaspora by presenting a variety of opinions from all perspectives, whether or not those opinions are shared by our editorial staff.

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