Karen Grigsby Bates

is a Los Angeles-based correspondent for NPR News and co-author, with Karen Elyse Hudson, of The New Basic Black: Home Training For Modern Times (Doubleday).

About Come Correct

Manners and mores in modern life? It's about way more than where the fork goes.

CAN'T GET ENOUGH?

THE BLOG FAMILY

In-your-face observations of art, entertainment and the world at large from someone who cares. Can you handle the truth?

NOVEMBER 30 | NBC Heroes Employee Says There's Too Much Diversity in Hollywood

NOVEMBER 29 | Black Conservative Doesn't Want Oprah to Interview Obama on Christmas

NOVEMBER 28 | Peru Apologizes for Mistreatment of Afro-Peruvians

One man's opinion on very nearly everything. It's hard but it's fair.

DECEMBER 2 | Ten Things You Could Learn from Tiger Woods

DECEMBER 2 | Aunt Jemima and Politics in Darktown

NOVEMBER 24 | Meet The Parents

Manners and mores in modern life? It's about way more than where the fork goes.

DECEMBER 3 | Desiree Rogers' Teachable Moment

NOVEMBER 28 | The Tipping Factor

NOVEMBER 24 | The Turkey Is The Least of It

From finance to foreclosures, layoffs and lack of opportunity, a daily journal of the economic crisis and its effect on black professionals.

NOVEMBER 27 | Making The Most With Less This Christmas

NOVEMBER 25 | Young, Black, and Out of Work

NOVEMBER 24 | Have Blacks Been Shafted By The Stimulus?

Smart, up to the minute takes on politics--from the state house to the White House. Pull up a chair.

FEBRUARY 23 | Social Networks and Saddam Hussein: A Private Matter?

JANUARY 21 | Hillary Clinton Stands Up For Internet Diplomacy

JANUARY 20 | SATISFACTION, PRIDE OR DELIRIUM?

Engaging commentary, interviews, and reviews that delve into and beyond the world of books. Get read.

NOVEMBER 25 | Conversation for the Dinner Table

NOVEMBER 19 | Reading List: The Poetry Edition

NOVEMBER 12 | Publishing with the Stars

A daily conversation on hot topic culture items. From Zora to Zane, True Blood to Tiny & Toya, TEWW covers high art, low-brow culture and everything in between.

MARCH 2 | The Best Gabourey Sidibe Interview So Far

FEBRUARY 17 | Would You Let Serena Williams Do Your Nails?

FEBRUARY 12 | John Mayer's Stupid Mouth

One woman's journey to shed 100 pounds in one year.

MARCH 19 | Michelle Obama, Home Cooking and Obesity

MARCH 18 | As a Victim of Sexual Abuse, Weight Loss Can Be Scary

MARCH 17 | An Inbox Full of Eating Triggers

KAREN GRIGSBY'S BLOG ROLL

Don't Ask, and For Sure Don't Tell

Sometimes it's rudeness, sometimes it's a cultural misunderstanding.  Whatever.  There are questions you shouldn't be asked that you probably will be anyway.  Herewith some answers that could be helpful:

 

Q: How much do you make?  How much did your car/house/necklace cost?

Y: My mother raised me not to talk about money outside the immediate family.  It's a good rule, don't you think?

 

Q: That's a really nice weave--it isn't really your hair, is it?

You: Of course it is.  (If you paid for it, it's yours, right?  'Nuff said.)

 

Q: Are you pregnant?

You: Why do you ask? (and sit back and wait for the sputtering to subside.)

 

Q: Can I borrow $5,000?  You have that much, right?

You: Sorry, those T-bills haven't matured yet.

 

Q: All those kids can't be yours, can they?

You: Why can't they be? (Again, wait for sputtering to subside....)

 

Q: Did your grandfather leave you anything when he passed?

You: A lifetime of fond memories and a lot of good advice--like don't spend time answering questions that people have no business asking in the first place.

 

Have you ever been asked an impossible question?  Did you figure out a snappy comeback?  Share with us in the comments section, below.

 

Karen Grigsby Bates is a Los Angeles-based correspondent for NPR News and co-author, with Karen Elyse Hudson, of The New Basic Black: Home Training For Modern Times (Doubleday)

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