How #YallQaeda Is Nothing but a Big Bucket of Highly Armed White Tears, Explained

The militiamen in Oregon truly believe that they are losing, despite the fact that by being white and male and landowning and armed, they’re winning by every conceivable measure.

Ammon Bundy (center) addresses the media in Oregon.
Ammon Bundy (center) addresses the media in Oregon. CBS News screenshot

Who is this #YallQaeda you’re talking about?

On Saturday, a group of anti-government militiamen—armed to the teeth and ready to fight to the death—took over the federal Malheur Wildlife Refuge after a protest in Harney County, Ore. They were apparently upset because two ranchers—Dwight Hammond Jr. and his son, Steven—had been convicted of arson.

The leader of this group is Ammon Bundy. You might recognize that name because his dad, Cliven Bundy, is the rancher who was in the news in 2014 because of a standoff he had with federal agents. The elder Bundy also doesn’t recognize the government. Or laws. Or even black people being actual people, since he has repeatedly said things so cartoonishly racist (like “ … are they better off as slaves, picking cotton and having a family life and doing things … ” ) that you have to Google multiple sources to confirm that they’re actually true. And it’s not a leap to suggest that the apple hasn’t fallen far from the tree.

Anyway, #YallQaeda is the name given to the group by people on Twitter, spurred in part by the reluctance of the mainstream media to refer to these people as who they really are.

What’s that?

Terrorists.

Ah, I see. So, after these guys were hunted down, shot and killed—and then arrested after being shot and killed—what happened next?

Wait, what?

Oh, I thought I was clear. Let me rephrase my question. What happened after the federal government stormed the building and arrested and/or killed these armed terrorists? I mean, if some unarmed and nonviolent protesters in Ferguson, Mo., brought out the National Guard and police officers dressed like they were about to invade Saturn, of course, actually armed and trained anti-government militiamen taking over a government building were met with full military force, right? That is what happened, isn’t it?

Actually, no. As far as I know, there have been no shootings, no beatings and no arrests. I’m not even sure if the police there are aware any of this is happening. You’ll probably find more Oregon cops today at a Portland-area Krispy Kreme than within a 10-mile radius of the wildlife refuge.

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