Should I Take X-Rated Photos for My Man?

Ask Demetria: If he wants to see your naked body, think twice or you might get Instagrammed.


(The Root) --

"My boyfriend wants me to send him some sexy pictures, and I'm hesitant about it. Aside from the fear of them somehow getting out and ruining my hypothetical chances of running for Congress, I'm no Victoria's Secret model! With all these naked picture scandals, are women still sending their men sexy pictures?" --R.M. 

The advent of email and camera phones means that going forth, some women -- and men, too -- will forever and always send naked pictures to their partners. And lots of those images will be seen by people for whom they were not intended. One of the main reasons for capturing an image is so that it can be shared with others.

You're right to be concerned about your pictures getting out. It seems that everyone thinks that won't happen to them, but of course it can. Your pictures may not be splashed all over the Internet for millions of people to ogle -- like, say, those popular nudie NSFW photos of Rihanna, Amber Rose, singer Cassie and Basketball Wives co-stars Jennifer Williams and Evelyn Lozada -- but you'll feel the same embarrassment if you ever find yourself posted on, or Those are just a few of the many NSFW sites dedicated to showcasing nude photos of wives and girlfriends.

Even if you're one of the lucky ones who doesn't find your naked pictures being held for ransom or posted online, be mindful that your images can still be circulated via text and email. I've lost count of how many supposedly private naked pictures I've seen of people who are or have been associated with folks I know or have met.

Plenty of folks like to brag about their latest conquests and their partners, too. On multiple occasions, I've received a text from one of my guy friends with a photo of a woman scantily clad, if clad in anything at all. (Guys, beware: I've also seen plenty of emails featuring your magic sticks.)

The images are requested because the partners genuinely want a keepsake. But they are shared partially because those partners like to show off who they're working with, and also because of the ego boost they get from showing others how they can get someone to do something seemingly illicit.

Kudos to you for thinking about your professional future and how sexy pictures could impact it. I'm sure NBA coach Mark Jackson wishes he had had your foresight. In 2006 Jackson, who was working as an announcer for the New Jersey Nets after retiring from professional basketball, sent naked pictures of himself to an exotic dancer with whom he was having an affair.

Six years later, the father of four and church pastor was the head coach for the Golden State Warriors, and his ex and her accomplice were demanding hundreds of thousands of dollars from him in order to keep the photos from leaking to the media. Jackson had to call in the FBI for help. You don't want this to be you.

So you know, a high-profile job isn't the only place where sexy pics can come back to haunt you and have a career-altering (or ruinous) effect. Consider the case of Tiffany Webb, 37, a New York City guidance counselor who was fired last December because of racy photos she had taken between the ages of 18 and 20. The termination occurred just days before she was set to get a tenured position, which would have guaranteed her a salary of $84,200.